If you’re contemplating starting a family, take a moment to carefully consider the man you choose to marry. While I appreciate artists like John and believe in the power of love songs, the idea of prolonged intimate sessions? Not so much.
Having been there, I can tell you that my previous experiences led to two kids and an overwhelming sense of fatigue. The only thing I’d rather do for more than eight hours is catch up on sleep.
Listen up, young women: If procreation is on your mind, think twice about marrying someone who takes “long and hard” to a whole new level. Here’s why guys who finish quickly can actually make the best husbands:
1. Shorter Sessions = More Rest!
In our bedroom, my partner and I adhere to one simple rule: he can do anything he desires, as long as it doesn’t disturb my precious sleep. Unfortunately, I’m a light sleeper. No one enjoys hearing their partner snoring mid-session; it’s almost as annoying as when he forgets to pick up essentials like diaper refills while trying out a new move.
2. The Kids Will Interrupt If It Takes Too Long
When you have kids, your romantic escapades become a race against time. Think of it as a strategic game of chess, where every move counts. One moment you’re getting into the groove, and the next, a child is asking for a glass of water or crying for attention. It’s almost like a timer goes off at every stage of intimacy—one wrong move, and the moment is lost.
3. You Don’t Know What’s Lurking in Your Sheets
After a week of sleep deprivation, you might find yourself allowing your child to snuggle up in bed, unaware of the dirt they’ve brought along. If your husband’s planning an elaborate performance, you might end up with unexpected surprises in your sheets. Less is definitely more!
4. Quickies Can Fit into a Busy Schedule
A great partner can juggle dinner while keeping the romantic spark alive. Imagine this: he pops a frozen pizza in the oven, pours you both a drink, and manages to make your knees weak—all before the pizza burns.
5. A Quick Session Can Save the Day
Sometimes, you just need to get it done before you realize it’s been a while since your last shower.
6. You’ve Got a Show to Catch Up On
With your favorite series waiting on the DVR, why should you wait? Time is of the essence, and those episodes won’t watch themselves!
For those already knee-deep in parenting, there was a time when intimacy felt special and slow-paced. Yes, that time will return (even if it involves a little blue pill). But for now, embrace the quick moments because your little ones might just be up to mischief at this very moment.
In summary, while prolonged intimacy may sound appealing, the reality of parenting often requires a shift in perspective. Quick sessions can offer more benefits than you might expect, allowing for a balance between intimacy and the demands of family life. For those interested in starting a family, check out this artificial insemination kit as well as this resource on artificial insemination for additional information.