Updated: July 2, 2020
Originally Published: June 15, 2017
It all began with a persistent headache—a headache that lingered for four long days. Despite trying various remedies, from over-the-counter painkillers to hot and cold showers, nothing seemed to alleviate the discomfort. When I consulted my doctor, she dismissed my concerns, reminding me that I had dealt with headaches before.
Then, in the middle of the night, something changed. With a sudden “pop,” the pain vanished, but not without triggering a wave of panic within me. I felt an overwhelming warmth surge through my head, reminiscent of a friend’s recent loss to a brain aneurysm. Fearing the worst, I woke my partner, Chris, and called 911.
As I sat on the floor of our hallway, anxiously awaiting the ambulance, I could hear my baby girl crying in her crib. In that moment, a devastating realization hit me: if this was my last night, my daughter would grow up without any memory of me. All she would have were photographs, notes, and the stories told by others.
During that frantic ride to the hospital, I pondered what those stories would entail, and I didn’t like the answer. I resolved to change that narrative.
Reflecting on Legacy
As a parent, I urge you to reflect on what legacy you wish to leave behind. When you are gone, how will people remember you? Are you compassionate? Are you nurturing? Are you loving? I made the choice to embody those qualities.
Change can happen in an instant. By replacing a single negative thought with a positive one, you can transform your outlook and the energy you bring to your interactions. Surround yourself with uplifting people and experiences. Evaluate your daily life and make necessary adjustments; it can be as straightforward as you choose it to be.
Recently, a friend visited and remarked, “You haven’t said anything negative about anyone all day.” At first, I was surprised, but then I remembered that I used to engage in gossip and negativity. It’s far easier to cultivate positivity and engage in meaningful conversations about ideas, dreams, and beliefs rather than tearing others down.
Living Fully
I’m not here to preach—I’m just a flawed individual striving to create the best legacy possible. I believe you should do the same, as tomorrow is never guaranteed. I am grateful for another chance, and perhaps part of my purpose is to share this message with you: Live fully. Put your phone down. Engage with the person next to you. Hold doors open. Smile at strangers. Express gratitude. Love yourself.
Remember, nobody will care about the size of your pants; they will remember the way you carried yourself. Walk gracefully, speak with conviction, and love deeply. Be quick to celebrate others, and most importantly, allow yourself to experience joy at every stage of life.
What Do I Hope My Daughter Will Remember?
What do I hope my daughter will remember about me? That I was joyful, that I laughed, and most importantly, that I loved fiercely every moment I had. I hope others can say the same about you.
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In Summary
In summary, life does not need to be perfect for it to be fulfilling. Embrace the moments, cherish your loved ones, and live as though each day is a precious gift.