As a devoted parent, I take pride in being in tune with my children’s needs and striving to meet them. However, the ongoing pandemic has taken its toll on my mental well-being. Since March, we’ve been navigating work and school from home, and honestly, I’m feeling utterly burnt out.
It’s not just the constant bickering between my kids, the disagreements with my partner, or the struggle to find time for exercise amidst working and cooking for the family that’s draining my patience. The overwhelming burden of decision fatigue has become the most challenging aspect of this prolonged period of staying at home.
I find myself bombarded with choices every few minutes. Whether it’s deciding on snacks for the kids or troubleshooting Wi-Fi issues, the demands keep piling up. Just as I’m about to make a decision, someone else needs me to weigh in on another choice, creating a relentless cycle.
Initially, staying home felt like an extended vacation. Sure, we had responsibilities, but our expectations were more relaxed. We enjoyed leisurely mornings, shared meals, and outdoor play. With warmer weather, our moods lifted, and we all believed that the pandemic would be a temporary hurdle.
As the days turned into weeks and then months, the reality became painfully clear: the pandemic was far from a fleeting issue. Daily, my family relies on me to outline our meal plans, set schedules, and manage chores. Who showers first? How do we align music practice with work and writing sessions? During remote learning, I juggle between my kids, solving issues left and right, all while trying not to lose my sanity.
I’m grateful for the safety and togetherness of our home. However, this constant closeness has placed immense pressure on me to make every decision for the family. I’m exhausted, and I doubt that a single day of self-care or an afternoon nap can remedy the nearly year-long toll of decision fatigue.
On one side, I don’t want to be left out of the loop. As a type-A person, I have a tendency to be controlling. I thrive on organization and planning. Yet, despite my strengths like creating chore charts and coordinating schedules, my mental and physical energy is depleted from constantly being asked to make yet another choice.
These aren’t life-or-death decisions; rather, they are countless small choices that stack up, often affecting subsequent outcomes. My husband and I have different styles when it comes to decision-making; I tend to act quickly, while he is more methodical. As a result, the kids know to come to me for prompt answers. While I appreciate my husband’s careful approach for long-term planning, the everyday decisions—those involving remote learning, house management, and parenting—fall squarely on my shoulders.
Some may suggest that I delegate responsibilities to others. Trust me, my kids do contribute a lot. I’m not raising entitled children. I’ve seen the consequences of over-indulgent parenting during my time as a college instructor.
Others might advise me to practice self-care. I do take time for myself: indulging in long baths, sleeping in on weekends, and enjoying a good book or binge-watching shows. However, the reality is that for most of the day, I’m on duty—just like every other parent out there.
The daily grind can wear anyone down. We’re all doing our best to manage a situation that none of us anticipated. Remember when we thought 2020 would be our best year yet? What a joke that turned out to be.
Today, for example, my kids swarmed me, each requesting a different snack just forty-five minutes after lunch. Overwhelmed, I simply stood there, my head buzzing. I finally said no. Later, when one child asked for early tech time, the other two quickly followed suit. I had to shut it down again. I usually don’t give in easily, but there have been moments during this pandemic when I’ve reached my limit and declared that I’m not accepting any more requests; I’m not a DJ at a wedding.
There have also been times I’ve completely shut down, called for my husband, and secluded myself to regain my sanity. I just needed a break from the constant demands for decisions, no matter how trivial.
This pandemic has revealed both our strengths and weaknesses and has served as a learning experience. I’ve established firmer boundaries while letting go of what isn’t essential. Still, despite self-care efforts, support from my partner, and generally well-behaved children, I’m utterly drained from making decisions.
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Summary:
This article discusses the impact of decision fatigue on parents during the ongoing pandemic. The author reflects on the relentless nature of daily choices and the exhaustion that comes from being the primary decision-maker in the family. Despite efforts to practice self-care and instill independence in her children, she feels overwhelmed by the constant demands placed upon her. The piece highlights the struggles many parents face in navigating home life during these unprecedented times.
Keyphrase: decision fatigue and parenting
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