My first miscarriage occurred early on, when the two lines on the test were barely visible. It was more bewilderment than grief, as we hadn’t fully processed the news of my pregnancy, even if it was brief.
However, my second miscarriage hit hard. We had known about the pregnancy for weeks, sharing the news with close friends and family. I was experiencing fatigue and morning sickness, and my hormone levels were rising positively — until they weren’t. At nine weeks, I underwent a D&C. My mother stayed with us, providing care and support during that challenging time.
In contrast, my husband stepped into the role of caregiver, listener, and emotional support. He immersed himself in work and maintained a strong facade. He had the tough discussions with family, delivering the heartbreaking news so I wouldn’t have to. While I expressed my pain, he silently bore his own grief.
After another miscarriage, a surgical procedure, and several rounds of fertility treatments, I eventually welcomed our son, Jamie — our rainbow baby. Throughout this journey, my husband listened as I wept, navigated my postpartum depression compounded by past losses, and reassured me that things would be okay, all while grappling with his own sorrow.
Like many men, my husband mourned our loss but received far less acknowledgment than I did as the one who physically endured the miscarriage. Yet loss is loss, regardless of the form it takes, and he felt its impact deeply too.
Here’s the reality: Men experience a complex mix of emotions — poignancy, fear, relief, and joy — after a pregnancy loss, just as mothers do. That’s why we adore these rainbow dad T-shirts. Designed by creative mom-of-two, Sarah Thompson, who hosts the podcast “The Parenting Journey,” these shirts aim to bring attention to fathers’ experiences after pregnancy loss.
“There are many ways to honor the moms of rainbow babies and the little ones themselves, but not much exists for dads,” she explained to us. “Dads experience pregnancy loss too, often suffering in silence while helping the mom navigate through her grief.”
The biggest challenge, she noted, was crafting a design that dads would actually want to wear. Based on feedback from various styles, she and her team opted for a vintage, surfer-inspired rainbow design. And we think she made a fantastic choice; this shirt is simply awesome.
“Even though the mother carries the child, the father envisions the kind of dad he will be from the moment they discover they are expecting. When a miscarriage or stillbirth occurs, it’s equally devastating for him,” she shared.
Thompson hopes these shirts will foster ongoing conversations about pregnancy loss and encourage the inclusion of fathers in those discussions. They serve as a meaningful way for rainbow moms to recognize the support their partners provide while also honoring the shared loss. There’s even a child-size version of the shirt, enabling dads to match their rainbow kids. Dads are encouraged to share their experiences and photos on social media using the hashtag #rainbowdad.
“A subsequent pregnancy with a rainbow baby can be daunting and filled with anxiety, and witnessing a father’s reaction upon meeting his rainbow baby is truly a special moment.”
This article was originally published on June 15, 2017.
For more insightful resources, check out this excellent article on infertility that provides valuable information about pregnancy and home insemination. If you’re interested in boosting male fertility, you can explore this fertility booster for men as well. Additionally, for in-depth discussions on pregnancy loss, visit Modern Family Blog, a reputable source on the subject.
In summary, the ‘Rainbow Dad’ T-shirts celebrate the emotional journey of fathers who have experienced pregnancy loss, providing a platform for their voices and experiences to be recognized and honored.