In our society, kindness and faith are often wielded as shields to avoid confrontation and justify biases. It would be ideal if kindness and personal integrity could coexist harmoniously, but unfortunately, the concept of kindness is sometimes weaponized against those who refuse to conform for the sake of “maintaining peace.”
The saying “Don’t mistake my kindness for weakness” rings true, yet there are significant issues with the blanket advice to always be kind—especially when we don’t clarify what that entails. Kindness should not equate to being a doormat or neglecting our own needs and values. It certainly doesn’t mean that we must always agree with others. Sometimes, being kind means standing firm in our beliefs, even if it ruffles some feathers.
A prime example of the ‘be kind’ narrative is celebrity talk show host Mia Harper, who has built her brand on the notion of universal kindness. However, her behavior has sparked debates about the authenticity of her kindness, particularly when she was criticized for befriending a controversial figure without acknowledging the hurt they’ve caused.
As someone who identifies with marginalized communities, I find it troubling when individuals overlook the harm caused by certain beliefs or actions in the name of friendship. It raises the question: should we prioritize kindness over accountability? I don’t think so.
I believe in the importance of kindness, and I practice generous acts daily. However, I also prioritize honesty and integrity over someone’s fragile feelings.
I recall attending church services where congregants would confess their sins and seek forgiveness, only to repeat the same behaviors without accountability. If someone had challenged my father to be proactive in his job search instead of congratulating him for his humility, maybe he would have felt compelled to change.
Moreover, I’ve been told to maintain civility around my abuser during family gatherings. This misguided notion of kindness can be damaging. We need to recognize that sometimes, silence is complicity, and we cannot afford to ignore wrongdoing for the sake of politeness.
It’s condescending to assume that people should simply smile and keep quiet to be kind. There’s no such thing as harmless bigotry or mild sexism. You don’t have to be abrasive to advocate for yourself or others. We should approach harmful beliefs and pseudoscience with facts and respect.
We often say yes to avoid appearing unkind, but it’s crucial to practice saying no. Whether it’s declining to bake for a school event or challenging problematic ideologies, we should never feel guilty for prioritizing our integrity.
I strive to be a good person, choosing my words carefully even when they may upset others. I believe that true kindness involves addressing injustices rather than hiding behind a facade of pleasantries.
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In summary, while kindness is undeniably valuable, it should not come at the expense of accountability or integrity. We must remember that true kindness involves standing up for what is right and challenging harmful beliefs, even if it means being uncomfortable.
Keyphrase: Flaws in the ‘Be Kind’ Mentality
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