“I Choose Not to Live in Fear” Is a Veiled Justification for Selfish Behavior

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I’ve always been the type to tread cautiously. As a child, I would sit on the edge of the sandbox, avoiding the sand beneath my feet, and I dreaded walking on grass without shoes due to the uncertainty of what might be hiding beneath. I was still using floaties to swim until I was nearly seven.

If you’re familiar with the Enneagram, I fall into Type 6, meaning anxiety has been a constant companion throughout my life. I’ve never been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, as it doesn’t dictate my actions, but its presence is familiar, like an imaginary friend. This made the onset of a global pandemic particularly challenging for someone like me.

Throughout this pandemic, my partner and I have taken every precaution we can. We strictly adhere to guidelines from health experts: no indoor dining, no gyms, no travel, and no unmasked gatherings. Before meeting friends or family, we ensure that everyone involved has been following the same precautions. It’s exhausting.

We all long for normalcy—the unfiltered air of life before COVID. We miss concerts, dining out, and distant family members. Yet, I feel the weight of this fatigue more acutely because I choose to live differently during this pandemic, while many in my conservative Southern community do not share this mindset.

I’ve encountered a recurring justification on social media: people proclaiming their refusal to “live in fear.” They often criticize those of us who are taking precautions to curb the spread of COVID-19.

This repeated argument frustrates me as it highlights a larger issue: selfishness. Taking the virus seriously is not synonymous with “living in fear.” Choosing to distance oneself from friends and family who disregard public health recommendations is not fear-driven; it’s a rational response to a global health crisis. This accusation is a form of gaslighting, undermining a valid human reaction to unprecedented circumstances. Gaslighting manipulates a person’s perception, pushing them to question their feelings, and it is never an acceptable way to interact with others, especially loved ones.

Moreover, the “I refuse to live in fear” rhetoric serves as a misguided coping mechanism to rationalize irresponsible behavior. I’m exhausted by those who act as if everything is normal while using this mantra to justify actions that endanger themselves and others. Global health experts have repeatedly outlined the necessary steps to mitigate the virus’s spread: wear masks, avoid gatherings, and limit interactions. These are minor sacrifices, yet many refuse to make them. The consequences are dire, as we witness thousands of daily deaths and hospitals nearing their breaking points.

So, spare me the notion that my sense of responsibility is merely “living in fear.” I am not afraid; I am compassionate. My choices reflect a desire to end this pandemic and protect those around me. When you attempt to frame my responsibility as irrational weakness, you reveal your own selfishness. You prioritize your social life over the well-being of others. It’s time we call out those who use this argument for what it is: selfishness.

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Summary:

The article discusses the common phrase “I refuse to live in fear,” which many people use to justify irresponsible behavior during the COVID-19 pandemic. The author argues that taking precautions is not living in fear but rather a reflection of compassion and responsibility. The piece highlights the problem of selfishness in communities that disregard public health guidelines, emphasizing the importance of protecting others during these challenging times.

Keyphrase: “selfish behavior during COVID-19”

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