I’ve always been a person who thrives on structure and busyness. My type-A personality craves schedules, multitasking, and meticulous planning. Yet, amidst the stillness of a pandemic, my calendar is nearly bare, save for a long-delayed eye appointment. Lately, I’ve felt more like I’m treading water instead of sailing smoothly through life.
I miss simple pleasures: dining out, watching my son Tyler play sports, grocery shopping without a mask, and the warmth of hugs from friends and family. I long for church services and the camaraderie of coworkers around a conference table. Most of all, I miss picking Tyler up from school and hearing about his day. Just last week, I was supposed to be hiking in a national park, but those plans have vanished.
While my list of “misses” could fill pages, I also recognize my privilege. I’m aware of families who have suffered profound losses due to COVID-19 and those facing dire financial situations. There are healthcare workers putting their lives on the line while I shelter comfortably at home with my husband and son. My husband and I are fortunate to work remotely, and I’m only tasked with overseeing one child’s e-learning. Meanwhile, a friend of mine, who is expecting her second child, has been quarantined from her husband, a firefighter, since mid-March. She shares heartbreaking moments of their son saying goodnight to his dad through a window. So, do I really have the right to complain?
Even if I feel entitled to my frustrations, I can’t ignore them. We’re all struggling with the challenges of life during a pandemic. I feel restless, anxious, and uncertain about the future. Will Tyler return to school in the fall? Will my husband, who recently faced a pay cut, still have a job in two months? Will I? Most importantly, will my family stay safe from the virus? Both my husband and son have asthma, which adds to my worry.
The stay-at-home order has disrupted Tyler’s routine as well. He’s a social kid who thrived on being around friends. Now, his excitement for school has vanished, replaced by a moody disposition and frustration from being cooped up.
Despite these challenges, I’ve discovered a silver lining: I’ve been gifted more time with my family, although some days it feels like a bit too much! Previously, I spent hours commuting, but now my daily transition involves walking to my desk. I miss our busy social schedule, but I also realize that those activities often consumed our evenings and weekends.
This newfound time has allowed me to bond with Tyler in ways I hadn’t anticipated. Watching him grow up has been bittersweet; I was emotional when he turned ten last year. As he becomes more independent, I find myself needing to adapt. His friends are becoming increasingly important, and I realize the isolation he faces as an only child.
To keep him engaged, I dove back into playtime with Tyler. Sure, I spent quality moments with him before the pandemic—biking, reading, baking—but this is different. Now, I’m letting him take the lead, interacting with him on his terms rather than from my parental authority.
I’ve embarked on creative projects: constructing motorized boats out of K’nex and Lego for bathtub adventures (which promptly capsized), flying kites while shouting “BANANA!” and engaging in Nerf gun battles. We’ve built intricate chain reactions in the living room, created tennis matches in the driveway, and even orchestrated explosive soda eruptions with Mentos.
We’ve built forts adorned with twinkling lights, where we’ve indulged in late-night movie marathons. One night, as I attempted to sleep on the floor, I was met with a whisper in the dark: “Silent but deadly.”
While playing might not be great for my back, it has rejuvenated my spirit. It’s offered a much-needed escape from reality, encouraged me to reconnect with my imagination, and reminded me to savor the present with Tyler. Those moments of joy, silliness, and laughter have been invaluable during these trying times.
Initially, I thought I was merely fulfilling a maternal obligation to stave off boredom for my son. Instead, I’ve discovered a newfound friendship with him—one that keeps me grounded and optimistic during this challenging period.
I miss my pre-pandemic life, but I intend to cherish this time with Tyler while it lasts. Although he misses his friends, I hope our time together has brought him some comfort. I’ve noticed he’s smiling more, and that’s a win in my book. And this weekend? I’m ready to dominate in our homemade BattleBot tournament, armed with a remote-control car and some duct tape. He doesn’t stand a chance!
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Summary
In navigating the challenges of social isolation, I have transformed my relationship with my tween son into a friendship filled with play and creativity. Amidst the chaos of the pandemic, our bond has deepened, allowing me to embrace joy and laughter during a trying time.
Keyphrase: social isolation and family bonding
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