Last week, I found myself retreating to my bedroom in the early afternoon. The day had spiraled into a chaotic whirlwind of complaints, disagreements, and time-outs. The details don’t matter because, let’s be real, we’ve all been there. Parenting, right? Just to sum it up, the day was the culmination of a long, exhausting, and challenging week. So, I escaped to my room and turned on Parks and Recreation.
My family has been navigating through some significant growing pains—every single one of us—and sometimes you just need to take a breather in your room.
Isn’t that the essence of parenting? Honestly, this is just life. It’s not always glamorous. It’s not always straightforward. And it certainly isn’t filled with endless rainbows and fairy dust.
Parenting involves sleepless nights that leave you with dark circles under your eyes that look like they’re ready for a month-long vacation. It’s unkempt hair piled in messy buns, and smudged mascara because, yes, you might have shed a few tears in the bathroom at some point. It’s often feeling lost and questioning your choices, followed by tough decisions and serious discussions. It’s those moments when you sneak away to sip your coffee and binge-watch Parks and Recreation.
Lately, it feels like we parents have to pair our #realtalk with a dose of #soblessed. But why? Why do we feel the need to justify our emotions? Why must we apologize for our authenticity? Why pretend that parenting—and life—is anything but a tangled mix of challenges and joys?
As parents, we possess the ability to experience multiple emotions simultaneously. It’s entirely possible to feel gratitude and frustration together. We can love our children so deeply that it feels like our hearts might burst, while simultaneously feeling overwhelmed by the constant bickering over toys or having to remind them to tidy up their shoes for the umpteenth time. We can appreciate our blessings while occasionally grappling with envy over someone else’s seemingly perfect life. It’s okay to love people and the world while sometimes wishing for solitude on a deserted island because—let’s face it—people can be a bit much.
We are human. Life and parenting are intricate and messy. We need to stop apologizing for experiencing “negative” emotions as if they negate our “positive” ones. I cherish my children more than anything, but there are days they drive me absolutely up the wall. I take pride in my work, but some days I feel like throwing my laptop out the window (especially when faced with criticism online). I’m dedicated to the causes I believe in, yet there are times I feel completely stretched thin. I am deeply grateful for my loved ones and my life as a whole, but some days (or weeks) can feel like an overwhelming storm of stress. That’s just life; that’s what it means to be human.
Parenting may not always be beautiful, but it is still profoundly rewarding. While I took a moment to scroll through memes about the “Pawnee Harvest Festival” (you know what I mean), I could hear my kids laughing together downstairs—followed, naturally, by their usual squabbles. Because that’s what being part of a family is all about: laughter, arguments, and more laughter, all in a continuous loop.
Too often, I hear parents justifying their feelings of frustration, annoyance, or anger with a “but I love my kids” or apologizing for having emotions that don’t fit the #soblessed narrative. We don’t need to do that. Life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows, and pretending it is does a disservice to ourselves and each other. We know you love your kids; that’s a given. Let’s stop feeling guilty about experiencing complex emotions. The human experience is a wild, intricate, and beautiful journey, and we don’t need to apologize for being fully human.
No one ever claimed that parenting or life was simple, but it is undeniably good. And when things get tough, sometimes you just have to retreat to your room for a moment (or an hour) before diving back into the chaos.
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Summary
In this candid exploration of parenting, we emphasize the importance of acknowledging the complexities of emotions that come with raising children. It’s okay to express frustration alongside gratitude, and we should stop apologizing for feeling overwhelmed. Parenting is a beautiful yet messy journey, and embracing the full spectrum of our emotions makes us more authentic and connected.