I’ve shared countless adventures with my best friend, Sarah, over the years. Our journey began in middle school and flourished through high school, college, and even our weddings. Living just a short drive apart, we text daily and know each other inside and out. Our friendship has deepened as we’ve both started families.
When Sarah suggested a trip to Alaska with our husbands, Jake and Dave, I felt a mix of excitement and dread. While my family, which includes my two sons, often spends time with Sarah and her partner, I couldn’t shake the feeling of anxiety as she laid out the plans.
Before long, they had crafted a twelve-day itinerary that involved flying to Anchorage, driving to Denali, and cruising through the Inside Passage for a week. I envisioned a series of potential disasters: car sickness on the way to Denali, tired kids during hikes, seasickness on the cruise, and meltdowns during long dinners. These scenarios had marred past vacations, but I had never felt this anxious about a trip before.
I worried about how my children’s antics might affect Sarah and Dave. In previous trips, my husband and I were the only ones affected by the chaos, but this time, I feared we might ruin a well-deserved getaway for our friends. I preferred to travel with other parents who understood the challenges of family vacations, and I felt apprehensive about spending their hard-earned money on what could be a frustrating experience.
Eventually, I decided to express my concerns to Sarah. I rattled off all the possible challenges—everything from the mundane to the disastrous. She laughed and reassured me, “We know! That’s what makes it an adventure!”
Months later, as we boarded the plane, I held my breath in anticipation.
What unfolded was a mix of chaos and joy. My six-year-old son, Ethan, collapsed on the first hike, exhausted and muddy, while my four-year-old, Alex, faced stomach issues on the cruise, screaming for an hour before falling asleep in his pasta. But oddly enough, my kids barely remember those tough moments. Instead, they recount with glee the sea lions they spotted, the glacier calving into the bay, and the wildlife encounters they cherished.
Traveling with friends who don’t have kids opened up a whole new world for us. Sarah and Dave encouraged us to step outside our comfort zones. We wouldn’t have witnessed a beaver hard at work had they not suggested a more challenging hike. They steered us away from the crowded cruise buffet to enjoy a leisurely meal in the ship’s finest restaurant, where we could savor every bite. Their gentle nudging led us to a breathtaking whale-watching excursion in Juneau.
Our children thrived on this new energy, too. Ethan stepped bravely in front of a massive moose, while Alex laughed off the rain during a hike instead of crying.
Child-free friends also helped alleviate the pressure of parenting. When Ethan became upset over a closed mini-golf course, Dave distracted him with his fancy camera. And during breakfast, when I was on Ethan about eating properly, Sarah asked him about his school, shifting the mood entirely.
Traveling with another couple also reminded us to think beyond our own needs. Ethan, aware that Sarah and Dave weren’t excited about trains, still suggested boarding the White Pass Railroad with them. I was proud to hear him ask, “Should we see what Sarah and Dave want to do tonight?” It felt nice to see my kids reciprocate the kindness shown to them.
Moreover, our conversations took on a new life away from the kids. While I loved watching my sons admire the scenery, I equally cherished the evenings spent with Sarah and Dave on the balcony, sipping champagne and enjoying adult conversations without the usual topics of Minecraft or toy reviews.
Though I appreciate the benefits of family trips, this journey taught me that I had underestimated what kids can handle and enjoy. Before becoming parents, Jake and I traveled the world, delaying starting a family because we couldn’t imagine doing it with children. I often wonder what we could have shared with our boys had I not been so apprehensive. I’m thankful to friends like Sarah and Dave for helping me see the joys of family vacations rather than just the challenges. Their influence has inspired us to embrace adventures like our recent four-hour mud hike in Kauai and our upcoming snorkeling trip in Central America. Now I browse travel sites with confidence, thinking, “We can do that. All of us.”
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In summary, traveling with child-free friends can provide fresh perspectives, relieve parenting pressures, and create unforgettable memories for everyone involved.
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