From the moment my son was a toddler, I made it a point to communicate openly about my menstrual cycle. Whenever I needed to change my tampon or pad, I’d casually mention that I required some privacy in the bathroom—much like saying I was going to grab a glass of water.
As he grew older, curiosity kicked in. When he first asked about tampons, I explained their purpose simply, associating them with my menstrual cycle. Eventually, he wanted to know what a period actually was, so I used kid-friendly language: “If Mommy isn’t going to have another baby, my uterus”—patting my stomach for emphasis—“cleans itself out to prepare for next month, just in case.”
As he matured, I expanded our discussions to include cramps, mood swings, and why some days I couldn’t exercise. Because I’ve always talked about periods with him, he can’t recall a time when he didn’t understand them. He’s even remarked how glad he is that he doesn’t have to deal with them and acknowledged that it’s tough for women. This opened the door for discussions about trans boys and men who also experience periods, reinforcing that while it can be a pain, there’s no shame in it—it’s just a natural function of bodies with vaginas.
I’ve had similar conversations with my daughter, but my focus on normalizing periods has primarily been on my son. I want to ensure he doesn’t grow up to be one of those guys who feels embarrassed buying menstrual products for a partner or who finds the entire subject distasteful. Remember ABC’s The Bachelor? One contestant, Jake Fender, thought period underwear was “so gross,” even likening period blood to feces. Over my dead body will my son speak such ignorant nonsense!
Guys like Jake aren’t outliers; a lack of comprehensive sex education, lingering stigma, and parental embarrassment perpetuate the notion that periods are taboo. Women still whisper when asking for a spare tampon, as if half the population doesn’t experience this monthly. Commercials still use blue liquid to represent menstrual blood—except for Kotex, which recently stepped up by featuring realistic red liquid in their ads. Kudos to Kotex!
Since we can’t rely on school sex ed classes to normalize periods, it falls to us as parents to do the heavy lifting. This is crucial not just for our daughters but also for our sons. Often, sex ed classes separate students by gender when discussing reproductive health. Can you imagine how isolating that is for a trans child? A trans girl in a room full of classmates with vaginas, knowing she won’t experience that, or a trans boy learning about erections without any discussion on periods? We have a long way to go to dismantle body shame.
Periods are still viewed as “gross” and secretive, something to be hidden, especially from those who don’t have vaginas. In 2019, a group of middle school girls from Bronx Prep Middle School launched a podcast called Sssh! Periods to challenge the stigma surrounding menstruation. These girls pointed out the absurdity of referring to menstrual products as “feminine products” instead of simply calling them pads. They also argued that boys should learn about periods to break down barriers. Their podcast won the grand prize in NPR’s Student Podcast Challenge.
We must educate all our children about periods, especially those who don’t menstruate. More than half the population either currently experiences, will experience, or has experienced periods. They’re not weird or gross—they’re a natural part of life, sometimes inconvenient but also remarkable.
The shame surrounding periods can have far-reaching effects. If menstruation is seen as dirty or shameful, it sends the message that the body it comes from is too. Bodies with vaginas are already subjected to scrutiny and restrictions. We need to ensure that our sons understand this reality, and we certainly don’t want to convey that their bodies or the bodies of others are inherently shameful.
Let’s raise boys who are comfortable buying menstrual products for their partners, daughters, or trans sons, understanding that periods are simply a part of life—not something to be embarrassed about.
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Summary
Open conversations about periods are essential for both boys and girls. By addressing menstruation without stigma, we can help normalize this natural process and foster understanding in our sons, ensuring they grow up to be compassionate and informed individuals.
Keyphrase: Normalize Period Conversations
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