A while back, my husband received a peculiar Facebook message from a stranger. After some detective work, we discovered he was from our large church community, but we had never spoken to him. His message read:
“Hey there! I wanted to see if you might need some advice on how to discuss health goals with your wife. I’m a nutrition and fitness coach and would love to help you approach her about getting active and healthy.”
This so-called “coach” turned out to be a representative for an MLM (multi-level marketing) company, selling a weight-loss program that cost several hundred dollars each month.
Looking back, I wish we had responded with the harsh reply he deserved, but I was still navigating my journey toward body positivity. I had just begun the shift from self-loathing and constant dieting to embracing self-acceptance. At that moment, I hadn’t yet developed the fierce sense of empowerment I possess now.
Instead of responding, we simply ignored the message. I asked my husband to delete it and avoided the guy whenever I saw him at church.
His message left me bewildered and furious. I always put effort into looking my best for church: stylish outfits, perfectly coiffed hair, and makeup that could make a statement. Sundays were my time to shine while my husband took care of the kids.
Yet this guy assumed that despite all my efforts, my husband must be so embarrassed by my appearance that he needed help broaching the subject of weight loss with me. Let me assure you, Mr. Unsolicited Advice, if my husband had any concerns about my health, he would voice them. He chose me just the way I am.
This kind of unsolicited advice is not an anomaly; it’s the same nonsense fat individuals face daily. Messages from strangers about altering our bodies through weight loss are common. People assume we are easy targets, convinced we want to change our appearance.
And guess who else faces this kind of scrutiny? New moms. Fresh out of the hospital and overwhelmed just trying to navigate life, they are inundated with offers from MLM wellness business representatives promising to help them “bounce back,” lose weight, or hide stretch marks.
If you think this isn’t a major issue, let me correct you. It absolutely is. This predatory marketing approach is nothing more than cyber-bullying. Targeting someone in a vulnerable state and exploiting their insecurities for profit is downright wrong.
If you’re skeptical, check out this Instagram post that highlights numerous instances of this behavior. It features stories of moms being targeted while recovering from surgery, ex-coaches admitting that companies encourage this, and reps photographing strangers to use in their marketing campaigns. The entire post outlines abusive tactics and the exhaustion of individuals simply wanting to exist without constant pressure to conform.
Recently, an acquaintance sent me the twelfth unsolicited message over two years. Not once did I ask for his help. He has a habit of trying to capitalize on significant life events. Each time I experience a major change, he launches a “weight loss special.” It’s beyond predictable.
And guess what? I’m about to have a baby. In his mind, that means I’ll soon be ready to abuse my body with unregulated supplements and extreme calorie restrictions as part of his program.
Clearly, he isn’t listening to a word I say. I’ve been vocal about my anti-diet stance, and I’ve spent years transforming my mindset. I finally have a healthy relationship with my body. I consult my doctor without fear, eat nourishing foods, and engage in exercises that make me feel strong and happy. I may not be thin, but I’m in a good place.
And let me remind you, I’m nine months pregnant! Do I want to lose weight? Absolutely! I want to shed whatever this baby weighs (and maybe a bit more from the swelling in my feet). But I don’t need a so-called “wellness coach” for that—I trust my OB to guide me through this.
After eleven polite refusals, I finally told him that I’ve developed a healthy relationship with my body and would not be his client, now or ever. I explained that focusing obsessively on my size and weight loss would jeopardize my mental health. I then deleted him because no amount of mutual acquaintances justifies ongoing disrespect.
This isn’t about hating MLMs; I have a drawer full of kitchen gadgets from them, and I love my garlic peeler. But I absolutely cannot condone the way some representatives exploit vulnerable new mothers, making them feel inadequate.
If a plus-size person or a new mom is interested in your product, they know how to find you. We don’t exist to fulfill your business needs. So, unless we reach out, maybe just…don’t?
For more on navigating pregnancy and the emotional challenges that come with it, check out this insightful post on Home Insemination Kit and learn about resources available at ACOG for pregnancy and home insemination. Also, consider visiting Make a Mom for expert insights on this subject.
In summary, targeting new mothers with weight loss products is not only unnecessary but also harmful. It’s essential to recognize that these tactics are a form of cyber-bullying that preys on vulnerable individuals. Rather than offering unsolicited advice, let’s support new moms in their journey of self-acceptance and health.
Keyphrase: Targeting New Moms with Weight Loss Products
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