Dear Alex,
I want to start by acknowledging that when we embarked on this journey together, you likely didn’t anticipate marrying someone who battles depression. When we first crossed paths, my struggles were hidden, even from myself. It wasn’t until our precious little one was born that the weight of it all became evident. Yet, through it all, you remained steadfast. You didn’t walk away, didn’t express anger, and never told me to simply “get over it.” Instead, you offered a listening ear and encouraged me to seek the help I needed.
I’ve sought assistance since that time, but I still have moments of struggle. We’ve learned that my challenges extend beyond postpartum depression; they are part of a larger picture that has been there all along, just waiting for the right moment to surface. The arrival of our child may have triggered it, but your unwavering support has kept me grounded. I am incredibly grateful that you chose to be with me, fully aware that our life together would come with its own set of challenges. Thank you for believing I was worth it.
I understand that my depression can cast a shadow over our lives. Your happiness is intertwined with mine, and it pains you to see me in distress. When I share my darker thoughts, I know it weighs heavily on your heart. But through this, you continue to strive for joy, not just for me, but for us both.
Sometimes, I worry that my struggles appear selfish. I have so much to be thankful for — a loving husband and our beautiful child — yet I still find myself feeling sad. I can only imagine how it might make you question yourself, wondering if you could do more to help. Please, I want you to know this: my mental health is not your fault, nor is it something you can fix. Your presence and support mean the world to me, and that is all I truly need. I am navigating this with the aid of medication and therapy, so please never let it weigh you down.
I recognize that I often voice how challenging life can be. I’ve even made remarks about wishing I weren’t here. But I want you to understand that it’s never a reflection of my feelings for you or our child. You both are my reasons to fight through the darkness. Sometimes, I ponder if my existence is worth the pain I feel, but the thought of missing out on the love and joy you both bring keeps me here.
Thank you for the moments you’ve allowed me to prioritize my mental health. Thank you for covering the costs of therapy, doctor visits, and medications. I realize these expenses can add up. Thank you for understanding when I can’t muster the energy to cook and for ordering takeout instead. Your efforts to fulfill my cravings remind me that you care. And I’m grateful for the late-night conversations when you sense that something is amiss.
Just as you have stood by me, I vow to always stand by you. I remember when you faced your own struggles with anxiety. I didn’t enjoy seeing you suffer, but I was grateful for the opportunity to show you my unwavering support. Now that you’re feeling better, I want you to know that if those feelings return, I’ll be right here, ready to support you again.
Life will inevitably present challenges — job losses, the passing of loved ones, or health issues — but through it all, I will remain by your side. It’s not just about reciprocity; it’s about love. You bring me happiness, even when my depression tries to overshadow it. Beneath the clouds of my struggles, there’s always a smile waiting to shine through, even if it’s not always visible.
I often find myself wondering if you’d be better off with someone else, someone who doesn’t struggle like I do. But deep down, I believe we are together for a reason. If it weren’t for you, I would have faced my postpartum depression alone, lacking the support that you provide so selflessly. We’re stronger together, knowing how to give each other space when needed and when to offer that extra bit of love. You understand me, and I understand you. I wouldn’t want to navigate this life with anyone else.
For as long as I breathe and beyond, my love for you will endure. You are an exceptional husband and father, and I cherish you eternally. I often think it’s unfair how much love you give me, and I wish every woman could experience such devotion. But I embrace it fully and promise to love you even more.
With all my love,
Your Grateful Wife