My Daughter and Her Friends Chose Swimwear from the Boys’ Section This Year

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A few weeks ago, my friends Lisa and Karen and I embarked on a swimsuit shopping trip with our five daughters, who range in age from 10 to 17. We headed to a local store that was offering significant discounts, as our girls had outgrown their swimsuits from the previous summer.

Each of our daughters possesses a healthy and positive body image. They also share a strong aversion to the stereotypical “girly” styles that are often marketed to them, and they are particularly vocal about their discomfort with the objectification of their bodies. As their parent and a female role model, I have emphasized the idea that they are much more than their physical appearance. I’ve encouraged them to view their bodies as tools to be kept strong and healthy, rather than objects that must conform to specific standards of beauty. Together, we’ve discussed the messages we convey through our clothing choices, whether intentional or not.

Instead of adhering to the societal pressures to dress in a way that caters to the male gaze, I have urged my daughters to think about how they wish to express themselves and what makes them feel comfortable. Clothing choices should be personal, free from judgment, while also recognizing the potential societal reactions to those choices.

As we browsed through the swimsuit section, we encountered a sea of pink and sparkly options that were styled like adult women’s swimsuits. My daughters rolled their eyes in frustration, as the available selections did not align with their preferences. They were looking for two-piece suits that would make bathroom visits easier, but they also wanted coverage to avoid excessive sunscreen application. My daughter recalled a painful sunburn from last summer when her suit shifted while tubing, and they were eager for suits that allowed them to run, jump, and play without concern for wardrobe malfunctions.

After some time, one of the girls suggested, “Why can’t we just wear board shorts and sun shirts like the boys do?” This sparked an epiphany; why not?

The girls swiftly darted over to the boys’ section, where they found matching rash guards and swim shorts adorned with sharks. The older girls discovered vibrant turquoise and lime green patterns that perfectly matched their tastes. They were thrilled with their choices, and we, as mothers, admired their ability to think beyond conventional marketing.

However, they quickly recognized a potential issue with their choices—the lack of a swim top beneath the sun shirt could lead to some unintended exposure during energetic pool activities. They decided that a sports bra would be a practical solution. While I knew that some stores offered sun shirts and swim shorts for girls that diverged from the typical pink and sparkles, the girls were satisfied with their finds in the boys’ section, so why complicate matters?

This experience highlighted the clash between personal preference and the patriarchal norms that often dominate the fashion industry. Many of us have experienced the frustration of trying on clothes that seem designed without logic, such as ultra low-rise jeans that offer little coverage and practicality. While some might appreciate those styles, I find them impractical.

I firmly believe that women should wear whatever they choose, but it’s essential to remain cognizant of the influences that shape those choices. Whether opting for a bikini, a one-piece, or boys’ swim attire, the decision should ultimately rest with the individual.

Although the girls may not have realized the statement they made through their purchases, I certainly did. These young women confidently selected what felt right for them, unaffected by the opinions of marketers, society, or peers. As a mother and a woman, I felt immense pride in their courageous decision.

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In summary, my daughter and her friends’ decision to shop in the boys’ section for swimsuits was a powerful statement of self-empowerment. They chose comfort and practicality over societal norms, demonstrating that personal style should be dictated by the individual rather than by marketing stereotypes.