Understanding Dermatillomania in Children

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One of my sons has recently developed a troubling habit. Over the past year, while lost in thought on his iPad, he has taken to obsessively picking and biting at his toes. This isn’t just your typical nail or cuticle biting; it’s what I call “full-on gorging mode.” Let’s just say the aftermath of these sessions isn’t pretty—his poor toes are practically obliterated.

Fortunately, this behavior doesn’t happen every day, and its frequency has decreased significantly lately. However, I still find myself worried about what’s going on with him and whether it’s time to seek professional guidance. I often question whether my approach—essentially urging him to stop—has been effective or harmful.

Insights from a Professional

To gain insight, I spoke with Linda Harper, a licensed child therapist and the founder of the well-regarded website Kids and Anxiety. She explained that skin picking is not uncommon among children and adults alike. Known as dermatillomania, or excoriation disorder, it falls under the category of Obsessive-Compulsive and related disorders, as defined in the DSM-5.

Linda reassured me that this condition is quite prevalent and highly manageable. When I asked how to recognize it in children, she mentioned that the most obvious sign is a persistent pattern of skin picking that often leads to scabs or lesions. It’s important to differentiate between these symptoms and issues stemming from other medical conditions.

Beyond the physical indicators, Linda highlighted the emotional toll this behavior can have. Children suffering from skin picking disorder often feel powerless to stop, which can interfere with their daily lives. They may also experience feelings of shame or embarrassment about their actions and any resulting scars.

What Parents Can Do

So, what should concerned parents do if they suspect their child might be grappling with excoriation disorder? Linda recommends finding a therapist specializing in Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors (BFRBs) for a proper assessment.

As for parental involvement, Linda offered an eye-opening perspective. My instinct to act as the “picking police” wasn’t exactly the best method. “This approach can inadvertently worsen the picking behavior,” she cautioned.

Guilty as charged—I noticed that whenever I pressured my son to stop, he seemed to pick even more. So, what’s a concerned parent to do? According to Linda, education is key. By learning about the disorder and sharing that knowledge with your child, you can alleviate feelings of isolation and shame. It’s vital for them to understand that they’re not alone and that help is available.

Linda shared a personal anecdote about her own daughter, who struggles with similar issues. “I stopped micromanaging her behavior,” she explained. “By empowering her with knowledge about the disorder, she gradually learned to manage her own picking.” This was incredibly encouraging to hear.

Resources and Tools

If you’re looking for resources, consider checking out Linda’s YouTube channel, where she discusses various aspects of this issue. She emphasizes that the journey of managing this disorder is ultimately your child’s. Your role is to provide support while they discover what works best for them.

In her video, Linda suggests practical tools to combat the urge to pick, such as using Band-aids or gloves to cover vulnerable skin and keeping hands busy with fidget toys. For more information, parents can visit Pickingme.org, and Linda recommends the book What to Do When Bad Habits Take Hold by Dawn Huebner as a helpful guide for kids.

I feel much more equipped to handle my son’s behavior moving forward. I plan to offer him Band-aids or socks to help, along with a selection of fidget toys. Most importantly, I will validate his feelings, reassure him that he’s perfectly fine, and remind him that there’s nothing to be ashamed of. I’m committed to stopping the nagging and fostering a sense of hope that this is a conquerable challenge for him.

If you want to learn more about parenting and mental health, check out this article, which provides additional insights.

Conclusion

In summary, dermatillomania is a common yet treatable issue that can significantly impact a child’s life. By fostering understanding and support, parents can empower their children to manage this behavior effectively.

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