When my child transitioned to middle school last year, I found myself inundated with worries typical of any parent. I fretted about puberty, social dynamics, and the academic pressures that accompany this pivotal time. However, what I didn’t see coming was the overwhelming obsession with the honor roll.
From the moment my child entered middle school, the chatter around the honor roll became deafening. His peers and teachers constantly discussed the distinction, with a 90 average required for the standard honor roll and an impressive 95 average for the Principal’s Honor Roll. The school hallways were lined with lists celebrating past recipients, further fueling the competition.
I’ve always told my child that grades alone don’t define success; what matters is effort and a positive learning experience. Yet, my child, a naturally competitive spirit, was soon drawn into the game. The idea of winning a spot on the honor roll became an all-consuming goal, and he dedicated himself to achieving it, often at the expense of his well-being.
At first glance, one might consider this external motivation beneficial. After all, my child maintained a 95 average throughout his first year, earning him a place on the coveted Principal’s Honor Roll and acceptance into an advanced program. So, why was I frustrated?
The relentless pursuit of grades took a toll on both of us. Even a minor dip in performance would send him into a spiral of anxiety. Sleepless nights were spent obsessively checking grades online, down to the decimal point. His mental health was suffering, and that was unacceptable to me.
During the summer, we had numerous discussions about the importance of focusing on learning rather than just grades. I tried to instill in him the idea that making mistakes is part of the educational journey. Unfortunately, he wasn’t exactly on board with that perspective.
The hyper-competitive environment of his previous school only exacerbated the situation, leading us to switch to a new middle school last summer. I’m not sure if it was the change of scenery or his own personal growth, but he seemed to relax his fixation on grades.
Still, the honor roll was alive and well at his new school, promising a pizza party for those who made the cut. Naturally, he still aimed for it, but he approached it with less intensity.
However, when the first semester ended and he missed the honor roll by a mere B+, the initial disappointment was palpable. After a few days of frustration, particularly toward the teacher who had given him that grade, he realized that life would go on. This setback turned into a valuable lesson about resilience and the importance of self-worth beyond grades.
Yet, I remain irked by the honor roll system. Recently, his science teacher read aloud the names of students who made the honor roll, amplifying the pressure. Isn’t it enough that schools impose unrealistic expectations on kids, driving them to prioritize grades over learning? With mental health issues among teens rising due to academic stress, can we ease the burden just a bit?
Why do schools not acknowledge other kinds of achievements? What about the student who struggles with learning disabilities but shows up every day and gives their best effort? Where is the recognition for them?
Honestly, the honor roll has been a mixed blessing. It hasn’t taught my child to value learning or develop strong work habits; instead, it only reinforced the idea that outcomes are paramount, often at the cost of happiness. That’s a lesson I refuse to accept for my child—or any child, for that matter.
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In summary, the honor roll can create more harm than good, fostering stress and unhealthy competition among students. We need to rethink how we celebrate achievements in education to promote a healthier, more balanced approach to learning.
Keyphrase: honor roll in education
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