My 4-year-old daughter has recently entered a “nature enthusiast” phase. At her preschool, they wrapped up a unit focused on plants and seeds, and at home, she’s been actively engaging with me in our garden. We’ve even borrowed some books from the library to expand our knowledge (she’s eager to learn the names of every plant we encounter, while I admit I’m not the most knowledgeable).
Her fascination has quickly transformed into a full-blown obsession, with plants and nature dominating her conversations—especially during our outdoor adventures.
Then there’s my sarcastic, eye-rolling 10-year-old son, Jake, who often reminds me how fleeting this innocence can be. In just a few years, I’m sure my daughter will find the idea of flowers being the most magical things on earth utterly ridiculous. With kindergarten approaching in the fall, who knows how quickly the sass will kick in, just like his brother.
As I try to cherish this phase, I find that every outing seems to take an eternity and tests my patience to the limit. My daughter literally can’t take a step without stopping to marvel at a bug or pick up a twig. While I want to be patient, it’s driving me up the wall.
Take this morning’s walk to school, for example: just two steps out our door, and she found a stick to bang against a tree until it snapped. A few steps later, she spotted a “four-leaf clover” (which she insists on calling a shamrock) and stood there, completely absorbed in her discovery. As we neared the corner, she spotted a “burr tree” (which is clearly just an evergreen, but that’s her name for it) and threw a tantrum when I told her we couldn’t cross the street to investigate.
At this point, Jake was clearly fed up. “I need to get to school!” he grumbled through clenched teeth.
Reluctantly, I pulled my daughter along, trying to keep the pace moving. After what felt like an eternity, we finally reached Jake’s school, and then we had to walk just one more block to her preschool.
That short distance took a staggering 10 minutes (I actually timed it). Next to Jake’s school is a beautiful garden brimming with large, vibrant flowers, and I understand why she wanted to linger there. But I found it incredibly challenging to maintain my composure as I watched the minutes slip away, constantly reminded of the work awaiting me at home.
In that moment, I was acutely aware of two things: my growing frustration and my daughter’s overwhelming joy. She was in sheer bliss, reveling in the surrounding beauty. She was frolicking and burying her face in a sea of flowers—something kids her age excel at: living in the moment. It’s a skill that many adults struggle to master.
Despite my efforts to be present, the demands of busy parenthood often pull me away from the here and now. Even while washing the breakfast dishes, my mind races ahead to the next three meals I need to prepare. As I lay out clothes for the next day, I’m already worrying about the upcoming season and what clothing we might need to buy. And don’t even get me started on swimwear for summer; where did I stash the sunscreen? It never ends, and my mind is constantly in overdrive.
Yet, when do we get the chance to simply be a parent? When can we push aside our responsibilities and immerse ourselves in our children’s world? I may not always succeed, but I’m genuinely attempting to carve out time during these walks to school. I try to let go of my worries and be present as she runs through the flower bushes, excitedly picking dandelions. Does it really matter if she’s 10 minutes late for school during this fleeting spring season?
And what if I lose 10 minutes of work time? Honestly, in my case, it likely won’t make a significant difference. What’s more important than those moments is how they will resonate with her for a lifetime.
These seemingly trivial moments carry profound significance for our children. It’s not just about letting them be kids; it’s about instilling values and teaching them what really matters in life. What will my daughter cherish most from her childhood? The material things she possessed or the times her mom took a moment to dawdle with her in the morning, allowing her to pluck a freshly picked flower?
Those are precisely the memories I hold dear from my childhood—moments when my parents paused their busy lives to be fully present with me, experiencing life together at my level.
Adulthood often obscures what truly matters in our relationships with our kids. However, our children don’t require much—just a few minutes of our undivided attention can mean the world to them.
So parents, I urge you: take a moment today. Set aside your to-do list, stop rushing from task to task, and spend time with your child. Take a moment to literally stop and smell the roses.
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In summary, while it’s easy to fall into the trap of adult responsibilities, we must remember the importance of being present in our children’s lives. Let’s prioritize those precious moments of connection, as they are invaluable to both our children and ourselves.