Losing my mother at a young age has left an indelible mark on my life. My name is Hannah, and I was only five when I lost her to ovarian cancer on October 19th. She was just 37. As I navigate adulthood, I often find myself grappling with memories that are both precious and fleeting. With each passing year, I strive to hold onto her voice, her laughter, and the fierce love she had for me and my siblings. Yet, the truth is, my recollections are limited, and I often wonder how much of what I remember is genuine or simply a construct of my imagination influenced by the stories others have shared.
Photos have become my lifeline to her memory. Sadly, I possess only a small collection of images—most are staged, with only a few capturing genuine moments. These photographs are so invaluable to me that if a disaster struck, they would be one of the first things I’d save, alongside my family. Now, at 32 and the mother of a two-year-old son, I find myself increasingly anxious as I approach the age my mom was when she passed. The thought of leaving my child in the same way I was left fills me with dread. I worry about the legacy I’m building and whether my son will have enough memories of me.
If something were to happen to me today, my son would have a handful of selfies and posed pictures to remember me by. In contrast, if my husband were to pass, he would leave behind countless images and videos showcasing his love and bond with our son. I can’t help but feel that my child would remember me as someone who filtered her life for social media rather than as the devoted mother I strive to be. He’s too young to remember our outings or the little moments we share that shape our bond.
Why Do I Share This?
I urge you to ensure you are present in your children’s lives—both physically and in photographs. Embrace the camera, even on the days you feel less than perfect. Your child will not remember the insecurities you hold. They crave images of you as you genuinely are, not just the polished versions you share online. Keep in mind that while posed selfies are great, candid photos hold a unique significance that your children will cherish.
One of my favorite photos of my mother isn’t from her wedding day; it’s of her seated on the floor, painting a chair. This image reveals her concentration and passion—traits I see reflected in myself. When I look at it, I long to unlock more memories of her essence.
In our world filled with technology, it has never been easier to capture moments. I challenge you to have someone take your picture regularly—whether you’re playing on the floor with your children or enjoying a day at the park. Don’t delete those images because you feel they aren’t good enough. Remember, you are your harshest critic. Your children will appreciate these memories more than you can imagine. One day, these photographs may be all they have left of you.
Additional Resources
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In summary, capturing memories through photographs is vital for both parents and children. As we navigate our lives, it’s essential to prioritize moments that can be remembered and cherished by those we love.
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