Raise your hand if you’re already dreading the end of Jessica Bloom’s pregnancy updates once her little one arrives. Jessica’s candid takes on pregnancy are some of the most entertaining content on the internet, and she hasn’t even given birth yet. When you blend a comedic talent known for her relatable humor with the trials of pregnancy, you don’t get dreamy sunset snaps; you get a third-trimester woman wrestling with the simple task of putting on socks.
“If you’re pregnant, like I am, and want to wear socks — it’s a breeze,” she quips. How can you not appreciate her for that?
“First, the left foot. Okay, a bit uncomfortable, but not a big deal.”
“And now the right foot. Easy peasy! Just stick your toe in. Then, try from behind, and hook your toe. Finally, you’ll just… kind of slowly… will the sock up your foot. And that’s what being pregnant is all about.”
If you haven’t checked out Jessica’s latest Netflix special, “Blooming,” you’re missing out. It’s guaranteed to leave you gasping with laughter, especially with her infamous line about “What’s your vagina circumference?” — an epic description of tampon sizes.
From pregnancy struggles (like the joys of hemorrhoids and the infamous bulging bellybutton) to marriage, friendships, and the awkwardness of teenage grooming habits, Jessica covers it all. She’s upfront about her own experience too, sharing, “I throw up an absurd amount daily. If you had a smooth pregnancy, I just hope your car flips over.” Who can blame her? I’m currently five months into my second pregnancy, and I spent weeks feeling miserable. If I had to endure that for the entire 40 weeks, I might have lost it!
Jessica isn’t shy about showcasing the real side of pregnancy either. She recently posted a series of photos of herself, nude, chasing ducks in a park. “On a chilly morning, it’s best to chase ducks without anything weighing you down—except a baby,” she stated.
Firstly, she looks amazing! And when I say “real,” I don’t mean to imply she’s lacking compared to other pregnant celebrities. She’s stunning. But we’d much rather see celebrities indulging in beignets during their third trimester than posing glamorously while looking perfect. Jessica delivers on that front.
Now, someone get her some help with those socks—her feet are still chilly!
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To summarize, Jessica Bloom’s humorous take on pregnancy struggles, from putting on socks to the realities of nausea, offers a refreshing and relatable perspective. Her willingness to share the unfiltered truths of motherhood makes her one of the most engaging voices in the space.
Keyphrase: Pregnant comedian sock struggles
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