It’s hard to believe it’s been six years since I welcomed my first child into the world. As my son’s birthday approached, I found myself reaching for my phone, ready to type the standard post: “I can’t believe he’s turning six tomorrow. It feels like just yesterday that we brought him home. Time flies!”
But as I sat there, I realized I wanted to express something deeper. I truly cannot fathom that my child will be six years old tomorrow. I vividly remember the moment we brought him home from the hospital, and it feels like it was just yesterday. Time has flown by, and suddenly, I’ve been a mom for six whole years. Am I doing this right?
Every year, around mid-July, I find myself in a whirlwind of emotions—joy, anxiety, and a hint of sadness. My second child’s birthday, which falls in November, doesn’t evoke the same intensity of feelings. Why is that? I love him just as much; in fact, he’s the “easy child.” So why doesn’t his birthday stir the same emotions in me? Each year I’ve brushed off the question, attributing my anxiety to various life stresses. Yet here I am, in year six, grappling with the same dilemma. What is going on?
Is my first child’s birthday genuinely more significant than my second’s? Yes, it is.
I will never forget when my doctor revealed my due date. “Looks like July 20th is baby day!” For the doctor, it was just another date on the calendar. For me, it represented the moment I would become a mother (I had always envisioned myself with daughters—oh, the irony!). I was excited yet incredibly naive. At just 23 years old, I had only been married for nine days when I discovered I was pregnant. Talk about a whirlwind!
We had barely moved in together and suddenly I was facing the reality of impending motherhood. I had a deadline to meet—not only to learn how to coexist with my husband but also to establish my career by July 20th. There was no time for self-reflection or planning; I had to become a responsible adult immediately.
On July 20th, at 4:02 PM, after eight hours of labor and twenty minutes of pushing, I held my 8-pound, 4-ounce baby boy. I was overjoyed yet overwhelmed by the immense responsibility suddenly in my hands. I recall sitting in the hospital two days later, astonished that they were simply going to let me take this baby home—without any IQ test or background check. What was happening?
The first year of my son’s life was a steep learning curve. I felt like a lost child in the woods during winter, grappling with my identity and what it meant to be a mother. All the dreams I had postponed until July 20th came rushing back, and I was forced to confront them head-on. It was a tumultuous time, but we survived.
By the time we celebrated his first birthday, I was exhausted and pregnant again. While I had matured through the experience, I still felt as if I had missed my “due date” for personal growth. That feeling lingered for years, until I finally realized that progress is part of the journey.
Every year, as July 20th approaches, I conduct a personal evaluation. It’s like an annual review for the most significant role I’ll ever hold. This date symbolizes the moment my responsibilities shifted from mundane adult concerns to nurturing another life.
July 20th marks the beginning of my journey to find purpose. After having my son, I could no longer justify spending 40 hours a week away from him, doing work that didn’t foster my growth. I needed to make my life meaningful.
Thus, my eldest’s birthday will always hold paramount importance. It represents the day I embarked on a lifelong journey of motherhood. Six years ago, I cradled my precious baby, promising to guide him. But to fulfill that promise, I first had to discover who I truly was. Now, after years of introspection and self-discovery, I can say I’ve found my way. I may still wander, but I am no longer lost.
While it’s my son’s birthday, it’s also the anniversary of receiving my greatest gift—the chance to be a nurturer, a leader, and a mother. I gave him life, and he gave my life profound meaning.
For those interested in family planning or understanding the journey of motherhood, resources like the CDC’s information on pregnancy can be incredibly helpful. If you’re looking to explore at-home insemination, check out this blog on artificial insemination kits for more insights. And don’t forget to visit this page on home insemination kits for expert guidance.
In summary, while every child is unique and cherished, the birthday of my firstborn symbolizes the start of my journey as a mother, shaping not just his life but mine as well.
Keyphrase: Importance of Firstborn’s Birthday
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