A while back, my two eldest kids had an all-out brawl over who was responsible for a fart. Neither was blaming the other; instead, they were both trying to take credit for it! Sure, it’s possible they both let one rip at the same time, but here’s the kicker: it was me who was the real culprit. Just kidding, it was definitely them. The point is, children can get into arguments over the most bizarre topics, leaving parents to wonder if their kids are a little off-kilter.
Thanks to the wonders of the Internet, I reached out to countless parents with a simple question: “What’s the weirdest thing your kids have fought about?” I received hundreds of responses, and I’m excited to share some of the most amusing ones. These anecdotes serve as a reminder that children often squabble over the strangest issues. (Names have been changed to protect the innocent.)
- Poop
“We got a new poop scooper for the dog, and my kids fought over who would get to use it. After they cleared out the yard, one of them went so far as to poop outside, leading to a squabble over who would clean it up.” Talk about an unexpected twist! - Space
“My husband had to intervene because our boys were arguing over a 1-foot square patch of snow in the yard. We have an entire acre, and there’s 10 inches of snow everywhere!” - Puke
“One child was furious that the other was using ‘MY puke bucket’—and the mad child wasn’t even sick!” What a coveted item to argue over! - Invisible Baby Ghost
“My kids had an epic showdown in the grocery store over a ‘baby invisible ghost.’ I finally took control, slammed it to the ground, and stomped on it. That ended the debate!” Sometimes, peace requires sacrifices. - Ownership of the Moon
“My husband has a habit of claiming things, saying, ‘Look kids, there’s Daddy’s moon!’ Now the kids argue over who the moon belongs to, along with the birds in the yard and even the mountains we pass.” - Birth Order
“My 4-year-old is constantly arguing with my 6-year-old about how unfair it is that he was born first.” Makes perfect sense, right? - Imaginary Races
“My 6-year-old and her friend came running to us in tears after an imaginary race. They both claimed victory but refused to share the imaginary trophy!” - Cyborgs
“My kids have been fighting for five years over whether the youngest is a cyborg. The oldest insists he is, while the youngest gets so mad he starts throwing punches!” - Word Definitions
“One of my kids was distraught every time I told her that ‘cat’ wasn’t the only word starting with ‘C.’” It’s hilarious how invested they can get! - Belly Buttons
“My almost 2-year-old was in a heated argument with my 6-year-old over whether she would steal his belly button. Serious business!” - Good Days
“My 4-year-old and 10-year-old debated over who had a good day, as if only one of them could claim that.” - Penis Size
“I have boys who actually argued over who had the smallest penis, even trying to measure to prove their point.” - Air
“My son and daughter were arguing over who was stealing the air in the room. It’s true what they say: kids can fight over literally nothing!”
These examples show that all children seem to share a common thread of ridiculous arguments. Sure, the topics may be odd, but it’s completely normal. You are not alone in this parenting journey!
For more engaging stories like this, check out our post on fertility supplements here and learn about at-home intracervical insemination kits here. If you’re looking for further information on insemination techniques, this resource is excellent.
Summary
Children often argue over the most ridiculous and trivial matters, from who owns the moon to disputes about imaginary races and even air. These stories highlight the humorous and bizarre nature of childhood squabbles, reminding us that such conflicts are a normal part of growing up.
Keyphrase: children arguments
Tags: [“home insemination kit”, “home insemination syringe”, “self insemination”]