A few years ago, while chatting with one of my college assistants, I lamented about the sleepless nights I’d been enduring since welcoming our new baby. My wife and I were on a relentless schedule, waking every couple of hours for diaper changes, feedings, and soothing the baby.
My assistant was a bright 19-year-old named Sarah, without any children or serious responsibilities beyond her studies and part-time job. As someone who naturally seeks to help, she pondered my predicament and suggested, “Why don’t you just sleep when the baby sleeps?”
Her half-smile, the kind that suggests she had cracked a code to life’s challenges, made me want to roll my eyes. I felt like snapping back, wanting to point out that she had no idea what real life entailed. I imagined dropping my baby off at her place for a day, only for her to wake up the next morning with the same tired eyes I had.
I was completely exhausted, my eyes bloodshot, and a weariness that reached deep into my bones. I had been up multiple nights in a row, and the prospect of endless more nights loomed over me. It felt like a never-ending brain freeze, leaving me to wonder if I would ever truly sleep again. Yet here was Sarah, who just recently complained about sleeping too long and feeling groggy the next day. I wanted to shake her and explain that I had responsibilities that didn’t vanish when the baby dozed off.
Working full-time made her suggestion laughable. When I was at work, I couldn’t utilize nap times. And when I was home, the baby’s sleep time didn’t equate to a quiet house. I had two other children, who were more concerned with snacks, screen time, and their endless squabbles than my need for rest. Household chores—dishes, laundry, bills, meals—still awaited my attention.
Even if everything was taken care of and the baby remained asleep, sometimes all I craved was a moment of peace, a rare chance to enjoy a book, browse online, or simply breathe without a child attached to me. But of course, Sarah couldn’t fathom this. Most people, even those who are parents, often fail to grasp the full scope of exhaustion that comes with caring for an infant. They don’t share the intricate details of the challenges because they’re too tired to articulate them.
I remember thinking back to my own encounters with parents who had expressed their fatigue. They would often be met with a dismissive “Why don’t you just sleep when the baby sleeps?” from others, without realizing how unhelpful it sounded. In that moment with Sarah, I kindly thanked her for her suggestion and nodded off in my chair, exhausted and still grappling with the reality of parenthood.
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Conclusion
In summary, while well-meaning advice like “sleep when the baby sleeps” may seem practical, it overlooks the myriad responsibilities that parents juggle and the unique challenges they face.
Keyphrase: “sleep when the baby sleeps advice”
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