My Daughter Has Autism, But I’m Afraid to Share That with You

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My three-year-old daughter, Lily, is on the autism spectrum. Sharing this information with you fills me with anxiety. She has put in tremendous effort to navigate her challenges, and I fear that revealing her diagnosis might create additional hurdles for her.

Lily doesn’t exhibit the typical traits commonly associated with autism, which leads me to wonder if you’d even notice if I didn’t mention it. You might observe her speech is a bit unclear, but who judges a child for having a speech delay?

I’ve had my share of experiences that have shaped my fear. For instance, I once contacted ten preschools only to find that their openings mysteriously vanished after I mentioned autism. Despite clarifying that Lily doesn’t need any accommodations or have behavioral issues, I was met with stigma. If educational professionals, who should be informed and accepting, can make snap judgments based on a label, how might you perceive her?

I genuinely want to inform you about Lily’s autism. We relocated here two years ago, but our busy schedule of therapies left little room for building friendships. I want you to understand that our inability to meet up often stems from her therapy commitments. More importantly, I hope to reshape your understanding of autism. So here it goes:

Lily is a delightful three-year-old who happens to have autism. She is the most well-behaved child in her preschool class (thank you to the school that embraced her), and she is incredibly bright, sweet, and caring. She enjoys playing with other kids, is sociable, and loves to share. Cleaning up is one of her favorite activities, and she is always smiling. Unlike what many might expect, she rarely throws tantrums.

However, she is also a three-year-old who, during the Easter egg hunt, became so overwhelmed that she just wanted to be held instead of collecting eggs. She experiences distress from unexpected changes in her routine, which can lead to physical symptoms like diarrhea and sleepless nights. Her schedule is quite structured; she needs lunch before noon, a nap at 1:30 PM, and dinner by 5:30 PM. Additionally, she has a rare speech disorder called childhood apraxia of speech.

Despite all this, I still hesitate to disclose her autism diagnosis. Lily has invested countless hours—over twenty each week—into therapy to reach this point. Almost every moment of her waking hours, aside from naptime and two half-days of preschool, has been dedicated to her growth. She has worked diligently to master skills that come naturally to others, such as pointing, sharing emotions, responding to her name, and speaking.

Through the guidance of exceptional instructors, she has learned to enjoy activities like finger painting, tolerate the sound of hair dryers, and even visit the beach. Lily benefits greatly from social interactions, making preschool and playdates crucial for her development. Ultimately, she deserves a chance to grow without the burden of judgment.

So, even though I want to share this part of her life, I choose not to. After all, she is just a three-year-old child navigating the world like any other.

Note: The author remains anonymous to protect her daughter from potential stigmatization. She hopes that by sharing her story, she can help dispel misconceptions about autism and one day speak freely about her experiences without affecting her daughter’s future.

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In summary, this anonymous author expresses her fears and challenges surrounding her daughter’s autism diagnosis, highlighting the hard work and progress her daughter has made while also confronting societal stigma. Ultimately, she chooses to keep her daughter’s diagnosis private to protect her from judgment.

Keyphrase: Autism Awareness in Children

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