From the moment my son, Ethan, was born, I felt a hint of uncertainty. At nine months old, it became clear that he was not developing in the same way as other children. By 17 months, I took the initiative to enroll him in feeding therapy, followed shortly by early intervention services. Despite the reassurances from well-meaning friends and family—“He’s just a boy; they take longer” or “He’ll catch up”—my instincts as both a nurse and a mother told me otherwise.
Ethan turns four next month, and although my journey into the world of autism began with his diagnosis just after his second birthday, I’ve learned a lot in this short time. Here are four essential lessons that have shaped our lives.
1. Take a Deep Breath
We often hear the advice to breathe in various life situations, especially during childbirth. We anticipate that first breath from our newborn, only to later find ourselves needing to breathe again upon receiving an autism diagnosis. Allow yourself to feel whatever emotions come—grief, sadness, or even joy. Sometimes, I find myself grieving the milestones my neurotypical daughter, Lily, effortlessly reaches, knowing that Ethan’s journey will be more challenging. In those moments, I remind myself to breathe.
2. Understanding the Challenge
While autism presents challenges for me, it’s essential to remember that it’s significantly more difficult for Ethan. He cannot express his needs verbally, which often leads to frustration for both of us. It’s easy to lose patience when I struggle to understand him, but I have to remind myself that I am not the one experiencing the confusion and overwhelming emotions. Ethan faces the world without the ability to communicate his feelings, and I need to support him through that.
3. Embrace the Process
Navigating this journey is a process—one that involves evaluations, waiting lists, and various therapies. A fellow parent recently reached out for advice about feeding therapy. I proudly shared that Ethan graduated from it, but I emphasized that it was a long journey. He spent nearly two years in therapy, progressing from stage one baby food to enjoying pizza at birthday parties. It’s a reminder that every little victory is hard-earned.
4. Cherish the Moments
Sometimes, I feel overwhelmed by the myriad of autism-related tasks—ABA therapy, speech sessions, and dietary considerations. In the midst of this chaos, I find it easy to lose sight of simply being a parent. Yet, when I witness Ethan and Lily playing and laughing together, I realize how precious those moments are. I refuse to let the weight of appointments overshadow the joy of parenting. As I end each day listening to Ethan breathe peacefully in his sleep, I’m reminded to be present and grateful.
In summary, the journey of raising a child with special needs is filled with challenges and triumphs. It’s vital to breathe through the emotions, recognize the struggles our children face, trust the process of growth, and embrace the joy of parenting.
For more insights into the journey of parenthood, check out our blog post on couples’ fertility journeys. If you’re looking for authoritative resources, Cryobaby’s at-home insemination kit is a great option. Additionally, Johns Hopkins Medicine offers excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination.
Keyphrase: Raising a child with special needs
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