Parenting
When I was around 11, my friends and I spent countless summer days at a rope swing by the river in rural Utah. No adult supervision, just kids pushing boundaries. That swing was just a sturdy, brown rope tied to a gnarled tree, and we were fearless. We practiced backflips, front flips, and even belly flops. There were times we climbed high into the tree and leaped into the water; sometimes we fell, and yes, we had our share of squabbles. Yet, not once did anyone caution us with a “be careful.” We learned to navigate risks on our own.
Fast-forward to today, and I have an 11-year-old son who likely wouldn’t even think of asking to go off on an adventure like that. A few years back, while watching The Goonies, he turned to me and said, “Where are their parents?” This highlights how parenting has shifted; we’re now in an era of helicopter parenting where caution seems to reign supreme.
Research suggests that allowing children to take risks fosters resilience and reduces the likelihood of anxiety disorders. A study led by Macquarie University and collaborators found that kids whose parents encourage them to push their limits exhibit fewer symptoms of anxiety. So, how can we promote exploration while still keeping a watchful eye on our children?
Ellen Sandseter, a researcher in early childhood education, has advocated for a shift away from the phrase “be careful.” It’s a phrase I find myself using frequently. Just the other day, I caught myself telling my son to “be careful” while he was using a potato peeler. Was that really necessary? The risk was minimal, yet I instinctively resorted to that phrase.
Sandseter categorizes risky play into six types: (1) play involving heights, (2) play that is fast-paced, (3) play with dangerous tools, (4) play near hazardous elements, (5) rough-and-tumble play, and (6) play where kids can get lost. Instead of defaulting to “be careful,” she suggests more constructive alternatives. For instance, when your child is climbing a tree, consider saying, “What’s your next move?” or “Take your time.” When they’re swinging a stick, you might say, “Sticks need space” or “Find more space.”
These phrases shift the responsibility back to your child, empowering them to assess their surroundings and make safe choices rather than feeling overwhelmed by fear. It’s about fostering confidence and teaching them to take calculated risks, a crucial skill in life.
Ultimately, isn’t that what we all need to embrace? Adopting a mindset of taking measured risks? By altering our approach to discussing safety, we can instill a sense of trust in their abilities and help them navigate their own paths, whether it’s climbing the next branch or making bold decisions in life.
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Summary:
In today’s parenting landscape, it’s important to encourage children to take risks rather than stifle their adventurous spirit with constant warnings like “be careful.” By using more empowering phrases and allowing children to assess their own risks, we foster resilience and confidence.
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Keyphrase: Encourage Risk-Taking in Kids
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