Life is filled with predictable moments. You can be almost certain that if you decide to wash your car or straighten your hair, rain will soon follow. Or that a quick Google search about minor symptoms will lead you down a rabbit hole of worrying about serious illnesses.
And when social media users celebrate their wedding anniversaries, it’s almost a given that the term “best friend” will make an appearance. “I married my best friend,” “So grateful to wake up next to my best friend every day,” “Feeling blessed to have my best friend by my side.” But I find myself hesitating to use that phrase because my husband is not merely my best friend.
To say he’s my best friend is akin to declaring, “It’s a bit windy,” while a tornado wreaks havoc all around. It’s like referring to the Grand Canyon as just a hole in the ground. There’s no phrase that can truly capture the depth of our connection, no catchy saying that can do it justice.
Before you roll your eyes or make a face, let me clarify: this isn’t about claiming we have some extraordinary relationship or a fairytale romance. We’re just an ordinary couple who’ve been together for years. We bicker over trivial things and serious matters alike, often because one of us is being stubborn (never me, of course). We clash on both major issues and minor annoyances, and life often gets in the way, leaving us wondering when we last had a date night or went to bed at the same time. He knows how to push my buttons better than anyone else—like choosing to use the bathroom at the worst possible moments.
Yet this is where the beauty of our relationship lies. It’s not just that he knows how to annoy me; it’s that he understands me at a profound level, and I him. Sure, my best friend might know I’m terrified of zombies, but my husband knows that fear stems from a childhood incident when my siblings let me watch Return of the Living Dead at a far too young age.
While my best friend might remember that I can’t stand fish or that tequila gives me a nasty hangover, my husband can recite my social security number, tell you which medication makes me feel like a balloon ready to pop, and explain the story behind the tattered stuffed bear I still keep in our bedroom. He knows how I’ll react in various situations, what I cherish above all, and the fears and traumas that cut deep. He understands the unspoken feelings and thoughts that I struggle to express.
I cherish my best friends; they hold a special place in my heart and are crucial to my happiness. We’ve shared countless laughs and unforgettable moments. However, I’ve never made significant life decisions based on their experiences, nor have I cried with them over shared hardships or fought for a resolution in the face of difficulties. My friends can certainly offer support, but they aren’t as deeply invested in my life as my husband is. When I think of them, I feel gratitude, but my heart doesn’t race with the intensity that it does when I think of my spouse.
Friendships require effort, that’s true, but they don’t demand the same commitment as a marriage. While friendships can be relatively uncomplicated, marriage is a different beast entirely. It’s about weathering the storms together, paddling through the chaos of life. The effort involved deserves a title far beyond “friend.” After all, you can simply “friend” someone on social media without knowing them, but that falls short of the complex, beautiful, and hard-earned love I share with my husband.
Until someone invents a more fitting term, I’ll stick to buying him an anniversary card with a humorous twist. His laughter will spark joy in me, reminding us of the moments that define us: we are so much more than just friends.
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In summary, my husband is not just my best friend; he is my partner in every sense of the word, making our relationship a profound journey worth cherishing.
Keyphrase: My husband is not just my best friend
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