Can we all just be honest and admit that the initial two months with a newborn can be downright brutal? Seriously. I adore being a mother, and I would go to great lengths for my two kids. I’m not downplaying the miracle of motherhood—after navigating through marriage, divorce, and a heartbreaking miscarriage, I faced a challenging pregnancy before welcoming my second child. I am truly grateful for my two healthy daughters, and I cherish every moment with them.
However, why is there such a stigma around admitting just how tough those early days can be? Why is it that when you’re up at 2:30 a.m. trying to soothe a colicky baby, no one talks about how you’d rather curl up in a corner than keep rocking? Acknowledging the challenges doesn’t mean you love your baby any less; it just highlights that you’re human and can only endure so much at a time.
While many paint a perfect picture of bringing a baby home, the reality can be quite different. So, when someone asks, “Hey, how’s motherhood treating you?” Instead of saying, “It’s wonderful! I’ve never felt more fulfilled,” how about saying, “You know what, it’s really tough. No one is sleeping in this house, I forgot to eat yesterday, I’m covered in baby spit-up, and I’ve had enough caffeine to fuel a rocket launch.”
The Chaos of the First Two Months
The first couple of months can feel like you’re stuck in quicksand while desperately trying to catch slippery watermelons. Here’s a glimpse into the chaos:
- You’re so exhausted that a mere three-hour stretch of sleep feels like a gift from the universe.
- You want to scream at everyone who says, “Just sleep when the baby sleeps.”
- You have to keep track of every feeding because your mind is a whirlpool of chaos and it’s easy to forget when you last fed your little one.
- Showering? When did that last happen?
- Your partner’s every word seems to grate on your nerves.
- Every little noise is irritating, and you find yourself frustrated with anyone who dares to speak.
- You’ve got this beautiful new life in your arms, yet all they do is eat, sleep, cry, and poop.
- If you’re nursing, get ready for the fun of cracked nipples and around-the-clock feedings.
- Your wardrobe looks like it’s been through a war zone of bodily fluids.
- Time has lost all meaning—what day is it?
- Even in silence, you hear crying, slowly driving you to the brink.
- The laundry pile is a mountain, and you can’t tackle it because you’re busy cleaning baby clothes.
And that’s just scratching the surface! The truth is, the first two months with a newborn is a complete whirlwind, both figuratively and literally. If you’re a new mom, hang in there; what you’re feeling is completely normal and there is light at the end of the tunnel. That moment when your baby finally sleeps through the night will feel like a vacation in the Maldives (or, in mom terms, a solo trip to Target).
How Friends Can Help
For friends of new moms, there are ways you can help. When you visit, consider bringing over a massive coffee to fuel her day and take on a load of laundry. Encourage her to steal an hour for a shower, maybe even shave those legs while you hold the baby—who, ironically, will probably sleep soundly during your visit.
Let’s stop pretending that those first two months are anything less than a challenge. It’s time to acknowledge the struggle and support one another through it.
For more insights on family planning and pregnancy, check out this excellent resource from Resolve on family building options. And if you’re interested in at-home options, take a look at our post on the home insemination kit.
Summary
The initial months with a newborn can be overwhelming and exhausting, filled with sleepless nights and challenges that are rarely discussed. It’s essential to acknowledge these difficulties while also recognizing the joy and love that come with motherhood. Support from friends and community can make a significant difference during this transitional time.
Keyphrase: First two months with a newborn
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