“Is there a insert profession here who understands special needs kids?” – a common plea from every parent of a child with special needs on local social media groups.
Last year marked a significant milestone for my son during his dental appointment—he managed to get through it without a meltdown! Initially, he flapped his hands, screamed, and emitted that unmistakable sweat odor, reminiscent of a sea slug warding off predators, but eventually, Dr. Max (not his real name) worked his magic. My son underwent his very first X-rays, a thorough dental exam with all those quirky tools, and surprisingly left the office with a smile.
Dr. Max has a charm that’s hard to resist. adjusts glasses, gives a wink
This experience highlights a crucial truth about all children on the autism spectrum: once you figure out how to ease their anxiety, things usually improve. On the flip side, if you mishandle a situation, the consequences can be severe, resulting in panic that’s tough to recover from.
Interestingly, Dr. Max’s approach last year made a bigger impact on me than it did on my son, as he didn’t recall the previous visit. During today’s appointment, my son appeared anxious, trying to maintain his composure, while Dr. Max adopted a more gentle and cautious demeanor. In what felt like a scene from a red-carpet event, I announced that I was stepping out to the restroom (appointments run smoother when I’m out of sight). Without missing a beat, Dr. Max replied, “That’s fine. I’ll take a look at his teeth, and you’ll be back shortly. Everything will be okay.”
Standing right outside the exam room, I overheard him reassuring my son firmly. When I peeked in, I saw my son clutching a toothbrush and toothpaste from home while Dr. Max was gently wiping his face with gauze. After we wrapped up, Dr. Max suggested, “Can you schedule another visit in three months? I think we learned that it’s better for mom to wait outside. Next time, I’ll take a firmer approach; it seems to work better for him.”
I thanked him for his understanding and patience. He responded, “Every child responds differently, and sometimes even from one visit to the next.”
Bam.
Every child is unique, and their needs can change from day to day. Yes, Dr. Max, you’ve succinctly captured the essence of working with autistic patients. They are individuals, each with distinct requirements, and it’s vital to recognize this during every appointment. Approach them where they are, just like you would anyone else.
While we’re at it, let’s acknowledge other healthcare professionals who get it right too:
- To the orthotist who would meet us in the back of our van to fit my son for braces.
- To the physical medicine doctor who immediately began using sign language upon realizing my son might not fully grasp her spoken words.
- To the hospital nurse who addressed my son directly, asking him his name and age instead of speaking to me right in front of him.
Medical anxiety is a genuine concern for many autistic individuals. The overwhelming sensory input, difficulty in communication, and fear of the unknown can be daunting for both the child and the caregiver. Recently, we had a specialist appointment where my son was visibly upset. The options presented were less than ideal: I could either hold my 12-year-old in my lap, or the doctor and staff could physically restrain him on the floor.
I couldn’t help but imagine how terrifying it would be if, while I was merely conversing, two large individuals suddenly appeared and held me down while another approached. If I wasn’t anxious before, I definitely would be after that!
It may seem surprising that many medical offices aren’t prepared for their increasing number of autistic patients, but doctors often have limited time with each patient and little training in handling disabilities. As parents, we do our best to ensure appointments run as smoothly as possible by providing all necessary information and details.
Doctors, take a cue from Dr. Max. His approach is key to successfully connecting with all your patients. Remember, they are human beings; assess their needs on any given day and adapt accordingly. We parents will manage the rest.
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In summary, the key to better interactions with autistic patients lies in understanding their unique needs and adapting your approach accordingly. Each visit is an opportunity to learn and grow.
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