Mom’s Hilarious Fantasy Football Rant Will Make You Want Your Own ‘Imaginary Dream Team’

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Image via Facebook/Chris Thompson

While Fantasy Football may be a game of make-believe, the challenges it brings to wives are all too real. Fantasy Football is like a second love for many husbands during the autumn months, and nobody captures this better than Jessica Lane, a mom, wife, and the voice behind the popular blog Not So Average Mom. Recently, she shared a comedic video on her Facebook page about her husband’s obsession with Fantasy Football, and it’s all too relatable.

In her amusing rant, Lane points out how her husband is constantly distracted. “I’ve noticed he’s been glued to his laptop and phone, even during our son’s soccer games,” she starts. Instead of enjoying family time, he’s engrossed in the “fantasy” of drafting players and setting lineups. Can anyone else relate to the sound of those ESPN alerts making you feel like a wife version of Pavlov’s Dogs of Rage? Seriously, how many NFL injuries do we need to hear about in a week? And why do we have to “adjust our lineup” at the dinner table?

“He’s busy creating his imaginary dream team,” Lane exclaims. “I thought I was his fantasy!” Classic.

“Fantasy football is basically adult Dungeons and Dragons,” she continues. So, what’s the solution? How about we create our own version of Fantasy Football? This isn’t to say women can’t enjoy the game—many do, even if it’s begrudgingly.

Lane suggests her ideal Fantasy team would include a cleaning service—actually, let’s make that two cleaning ladies. “THIS IS A FANTASY TEAM!” she laughs. Her lineup would also feature a personal chef, a tutor, a driver, two nannies, and someone to do her laundry. “Honestly, I’d pay anything to have someone fold my clothes!” she adds. I’d take that over the best wide receiver any day.

For the men who find themselves lost in the depths of Fantasy Football until January, Lane has some advice: don’t forget to pitch in around the house. “You know what’s attractive? Vacuuming,” she quips. “That’ll earn you weeks of Fantasy Football privileges.”

Lane mentioned that her husband found her video amusing, although he still won’t reveal how many leagues he’s in or the amount he’s spent this season. “He did say my dream team with a cleaning lady sounded more ‘unrealistic’ than his,” she chuckles.

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In summary, Lane’s humorous take on Fantasy Football serves as a reminder that while the game may be fictitious, the effects on family life are very real. Let’s embrace our own fantasies, whether they involve cleaning services or a bit of extra help around the house!

Keyphrase: Fantasy Football Rant

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