Mom Burnout Is a Real Struggle, And It’s Absolutely Tough

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As the kids head back to school this week, I find myself reflecting on our lively summer. I cherished the time spent together, juggling work and play to create lasting memories. Yet, after a whirlwind of back-to-school shopping, orientations, supply hunts, ice cream socials, and team meetings, I’m completely drained.

And when I say drained, I mean I’m burnt out.

Burnout is a harsh reality for many of us, creeping in when we least expect it. Balancing parenting, work, health, and our children’s busy schedules can leave anyone feeling overwhelmed. Society often pushes the notion that we need to be “on” at all times, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy when we scroll through social media and see others seemingly managing it all. You might find yourself volunteering for the school play, even when you know it’s too much on your already full plate.

Experiencing burnout can feel like you’re just trudging through the days, waiting for the moment you can collapse into bed, only to wake up and repeat the cycle. It robs you of joy, saps your energy, and leaves you feeling irritable. It’s that unsettling feeling of forgetting what you last ate or agreeing to commitments that you really have no interest in, only to feel resentful later. It’s like living the same monotonous day over and over again, crossing tasks off your to-do list but never feeling fulfilled.

We often accept this as our “normal,” complaining about our exhaustion and frustration while drowning in responsibilities. I’ve been there, and I know you’ve felt it too. Even those who teach mindfulness and self-care experience it.

Brenna Lee, a well-known author and researcher, has spent years exploring themes of vulnerability and courage. She highlights that “Burnout has become so widespread that it can even feel like part of our identity.” I completely agree.

Running ourselves into the ground can turn into a habit. Brenna once shared a piece of advice from a priest that resonated deeply: “If you don’t want to burn out, stop living like you’re on fire.” It’s a wake-up call, isn’t it?

We need to recognize that our well-being matters. As Brenna points out, when we start feeling frazzled, it’s often because we’re seeking validation through our busyness, and we must reevaluate both our schedules and our mindset. Staying busy may distract us from uncomfortable feelings, but embracing all emotions—both good and bad—is vital for self-acceptance.

Three Dares to Address Burnout

To address burnout effectively, Brenna advises us to embrace what she calls the Three Dares:

  1. Dare to be honest about your burnout. Everyone experiences it differently. Some may feel irritable, while others might struggle to even remember where they’re headed. Acknowledging these feelings is the first step.
  2. Dare to set boundaries. This advice is a game-changer: “Just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should.” It’s tempting to say yes to everything because we think we can handle it, but it’s essential to recognize when enough is enough. Saying no can be liberating and allows us to focus on what truly matters.
  3. Dare to create space for yourself. Find that one activity that brings you joy—whether it’s weekly chats with a friend, diving into a good book, or simply enjoying a peaceful stroll. Prioritize this like you would any other obligation, because self-care is crucial.

Avoiding burnout is no easy feat, and prioritizing oneself often feels daunting. However, starting small and gradually investing in your well-being can lead to positive changes in your life.

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In summary, recognizing and addressing mom burnout is essential for our well-being. By setting boundaries, creating personal time, and embracing our feelings, we can move towards a healthier, more balanced life.

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