The Tale of Uncle Adam: A Lesson in Kindness for My Kids

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My kids are always curious about my childhood adventures, and I relish the opportunity to share those stories with them. Most often, they’re filled with humor or moments that make them gasp, like the time my dad got kicked out of my Little League game. But just the other day, while we were driving, I decided to share a different kind of story, one about their Uncle Adam, especially with the school year around the corner.

Adam, my older brother by 18 months, was held back in school early on, which meant we spent most of our educational journey together, almost like twins. While we did attend separate schools for a bit, we shared countless years in the same classes.

Uncle Adam is genuinely one of the kindest souls you’ll ever meet, and my children absolutely adore him. With a heart as big as a teddy bear, he has always been a friend to everyone. However, Adam faces challenges due to his disability, and during his school days, he was often the target of a small group of bullies.

Most of his classmates were kind; they would smile back when he greeted them and offer high-fives if he asked, but there were those few who needed to unleash their own insecurities by picking on him.

I can vividly recall many days when I’d turn a corner to find Adam breakdancing in a hallway, bringing smiles to many while a group of mean kids laughed at him. He danced joyfully, blissfully unaware of the difference between laughter that comes from joy and laughter that comes from mockery. I was always the one to step in and put a stop to it.

There were frequent incidents in the lunchroom too. I’d see him performing karate atop a table, while a similar cycle of mocking unfolded. His lunch money often went missing, and kids would make him repeat silly phrases just for a laugh. Sometimes, I’d watch as a pencil was thrown at him just to elicit a reaction.

But the story I chose to share during our car ride was a particularly tough one: One morning at school, a group of kids told Adam to take off his shoes, and they then flushed them down the toilet. They didn’t go down but rather swirled around as the kids laughed and pumped the flusher. Adam spent the remainder of the day in his socks. When I heard about it, I rushed to the girls’ bathroom, knelt in a stall, and sobbed uncontrollably. I couldn’t fathom how anyone could be so cruel to someone so vulnerable.

I explained to my kids how our dad left work to bring Adam new shoes later that day and how that night, Mom and I cried together over the injustice of it all. My children were puzzled as to why anyone would behave that way, and I admitted that I still couldn’t grasp it, nor could Uncle Adam.

Then I imparted this crucial lesson to them: Always treat others with kindness, whether at school or anywhere else. Never attempt to hurt someone, as it impacts everyone who loves them too. I encouraged them to be more than just “nice” — to be the kids who stand up for those in need. There were some classmates who, before I could reach Adam, would step in and defend him, assuring him he could count on them. They weren’t my friends, but the support they showed meant the world to me. If Adam approached them, they were always ready to help. I urged my children to embody that spirit.

That day, I realized I had been so caught up in preparing for the new school year—schedules, clothes, sports carpooling—that I hadn’t spoken enough about the importance of kindness. It’s a daily lesson, yet in light of all the recent bullying reports, it felt necessary to have a more direct conversation.

I know my kids won’t always get it right. They may occasionally leave someone out or unintentionally hurt a friend’s feelings. But this year, I made it clear that any form of bullying, teasing, or taunting is unacceptable and would be deeply disappointing.

As our children head back to school, let’s remind them of the power of kindness and the importance of standing up for those who might need a little extra support. And I assure you, somewhere out there, a grateful sister will appreciate their efforts.

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In summary, sharing tales of kindness, like that of Uncle Adam, not only foster empathy but also equip our children with the tools they need to navigate their social worlds. Let’s make kindness a priority as they embark on a new school year.

Keyphrase: Lesson in Kindness

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