As a child, I remember two girls whose bedtime was a strict 7:30 p.m. — and they were just 7 and 5 years old. Fast forward to my own kids, ages 7 and 5, and if they’ve polished off their post-dinner snack by 7:30 p.m., I might just faint from disbelief. On any given night, I can count on one hand the occasions we’ve wrapped up bedtime before 8:30 p.m.
Sure, occasionally one of them will crash at 7 p.m. after an early wake-up at 5 a.m., but for the most part, my little ones are true night owls. They don’t start feeling sleepy until around 9:30 p.m. Rather than wrestle them into submission for an hour, we simply slip them into their pajamas at that time and aim to finish bedtime by 10 p.m. sharp. Occasionally, I might be too tired to enforce an early bedtime, and if they’re engrossed in Lego creations (and not squabbling), they might stay up until 11 p.m.
My kids are night owls. And you know what? I’m totally fine with it.
We’re not alone in this. For every parent who has their kids tucked in by 8 p.m. on the dot, there are those of us blessed (or cursed, depending on how you see it) with mini night owls. We often keep quiet about it due to societal expectations. There’s a prevailing belief that children should have an early bedtime, ideally between 7:30 and 8:30 p.m. Anything beyond that is seen as a sign of a disorganized family life.
What Do Our Kids Do So Late?
Well, they engage in the same activities they enjoy throughout the day. They play, build their Lego masterpieces, and turn their room into a disaster zone (which will certainly lead to some consequences later). They watch TV, and right now, as I write this at 7:15 p.m., they’re racing around with the airplanes they built while also half-watching Animaniacs. It’s just an extension of their day for us night owl parents.
When Do We Get Our Alone Time?
Well, many of us night owl parents are night owls ourselves, or we have to adapt to our kids’ schedules. We spend time with them while they play, and then we unwind once they’re asleep. Just like any other family. We tackle chores while they’re busy, not waiting for them to drift off before doing laundry or washing dishes. If we did, we’d never accomplish anything or have time to ourselves.
People often suggest we should try to get them on a “better” schedule. Believe me, every parent of a night owl has attempted that. We’ve put them to bed, only to find them getting up to play, yelling for drinks of water, or needing to use the bathroom every five minutes. In other cases, we’ve had to lay beside them while they kicked, cried, and rolled around for hours. It’s a miserable experience for everyone involved.
Eventually, we threw our hands up in defeat, allowing our kids to get up or setting them free from our grips, only to try again when they were genuinely tired. For my kids, that’s usually around 9:30 or 10 p.m.
When my 7-year-old hits the pillow, he’s out like a light. The 3-year-old snuggles into my arms and drifts back to sleep, while the 5-year-old takes a bit longer but is usually asleep in 15 minutes, provided he’s had a chance to run around during the day. Night owls tend to fall asleep quickly, so our bedtime routine is short and sweet.
Do I Sometimes Wish for an Earlier Bedtime?
Sure, especially on days when they have to wake up early. We homeschool, so it’s generally not a big deal. However, if I have an early appointment, I have to wake them for the sitter. Every night owl family has those moments when we think, “Ugh, why can’t you just go to sleep earlier like other kids?” But we manage. We shake them awake, sing their favorite songs, and usually, breakfast is what finally stirs them. Oh, it can be a struggle.
But it’s all worth it during those warm summer nights. We go toad hunting, search for slugs, and gaze at the stars while catching lightning bugs. We have time for them to clean their rooms before bed without starting their bedtime routine at 6 p.m.
Our kids, like yours, are joyful. They just happen to have different internal clocks. Their circadian rhythms differ from other children’s, and that’s perfectly normal. We don’t judge adults for their sleep habits, so why do it to our kids? We simply learn to embrace it. For us night owl parents, it’s just part of life.
And spare us the lectures. Our kids are thriving, happy, and healthy — just like yours.
In Summary
Having night owl children can feel isolating in a society that values early bedtimes, but it can also come with its own unique joys. Embracing our children’s natural rhythms allows us to enjoy special moments together, even if it means dealing with some early morning grumpiness.
Keyphrase: night owls parenting
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