By: Emily Johnson
Both of my boys were nearly two feet long at birth. With their big heads, wide eyes, and long limbs, I often wondered how I managed to carry all that baby inside me. By the time they were just 10 weeks old, many people assumed they were closer to six months. Their size led to noticeable differences in how they were treated compared to my daughter, who weighed a petite six pounds and was 19 inches long. It seemed folks thought that if they looked older, they should behave accordingly.
But I quickly realized that behavior and cognitive development aren’t dictated by height or weight. Just because they might appear older doesn’t mean they should act that way. Let’s stop making blanket assumptions about a child’s maturity based solely on their size.
People often comment on my kids’ stature, which is generally fine, as long as they don’t expect them to behave like they’re three years older than they are. Sure, they might seem immature at times, but they’re acting just as they should for their age. I won’t force them to conform to unrealistic expectations or feel guilty for displaying age-appropriate behavior.
Both boys are the tallest in their class, and I’ve lost count of how many times their size has been a topic of conversation. It’s funny—until I see my grocery bill! When will this growth spurt madness end? I can barely keep up with buying new pants and socks every couple of months. Just the other day, I spent over $20 on four pairs of underwear for my oldest. At 13, he’s already deep into the men’s section, and I can’t even begin to discuss his shoe size. I fear we’ll soon be shopping in the big and tall aisle! They come from a tall lineage, with both grandfathers standing at an impressive 6’4”.
The cost of feeding and clothing these boys sometimes makes me want to weep over the receipts. Before long, I’ll be the shortest one in the family—please send help!
From a young age, they’ve been aware of their size and have often felt different from their peers. I recall a conversation with my oldest son in kindergarten, who wished he was smaller like his friend, Jacob. It broke my heart. I knew that self-esteem issues would arise eventually, but I didn’t expect it to happen so soon.
During a visit to the pediatrician, I learned my 11-year-old is the size of most 14-year-olds and my 8-year-old is comparable to most 11-year-olds. The doctor reminded me that there’s a wide range of what is considered normal, something many forget when it comes to children. Some grow faster, some slower, but that doesn’t mean there should be concern about their development. If they were smaller, they’d likely wish to be bigger. It’s just human nature, and it’s our job to instill confidence in them regardless of their appearance. We want to nurture kids who can appreciate their own bodies and respect others’.
As they grow older and become more accustomed to their bodies, both boys seem to be more comfortable in their skin. My oldest embraces being taller than his classmates, despite the unrealistic expectations and judgments from outsiders. That’s what we, as parents, hope for—children who accept and love themselves just as they are. We know this can be a lifelong journey, and we want to help them avoid that daunting cycle of self-doubt.
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In summary, while size can affect how children are perceived and treated, it’s crucial to remember that behavior and development are not determined by stature. Fostering self-acceptance and confidence in our kids, regardless of their appearance, should be our priority.
Keyphrase: Your Child and Size Perception
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