Ah, summer. For those of us who stay at home or work from home, it’s a welcome break from the structured chaos of the school year. Sure, our to-do lists are still overflowing, but at least we can enjoy a little freedom for a few months. However, summer also brings its own set of challenges—not just the endless popsicle consumption (seriously, if I had a dollar for every time I yelled, “I just bought those!”).
What really gets me is how, when you’re home during the day with your kids, your house suddenly becomes the go-to spot for other parents looking to escape the dreaded phrase, “I’m bored!” You know the type: they ring your doorbell before you’ve even had your morning coffee and linger until you finally muster the courage to say, “Uh, shouldn’t you check in with your parents?” I’m talking about the kids who seem to have a standing invitation, devouring your snacks and soaking up your air conditioning as if they were part of the family.
Now, I’m not a total grouch. I enjoy having my kids’ friends over to play; that’s what summer is all about, after all. It keeps the kids entertained and helps prevent sibling squabbles. But when the doorbell rings and my kids exchange glances of dread because they know it’s Lucas from across the street—who was just here for six hours yesterday and might be aiming to set a new record today—that’s when I find myself in a bit of a parenting dilemma.
I don’t want to lie to Lucas and tell him we have plans when all I’m really doing is lounging around. That sets a bad example. But I also can’t just be blunt and say, “Hey, Lucas, you come over too much and you’re a bit of a whiner,” because I’m trying to teach my kids the importance of inclusivity. So, I invite him in again, hoping it’s dull enough for him to realize that his own home is more entertaining. Spoiler alert: it never is.
Meanwhile, he’s polishing off my snacks at a rate that rivals my own children, and when lunch rolls around, there he is with a plate in hand. And don’t even get me started on his parents, who seem blissfully unaware of where he’s been for most of the day (or week, for that matter). It often feels like they don’t even know he’s missing!
I get it; the idea of someone else supervising your kids’ summer fun can be pretty appealing. That’s probably why summer camps are so popular. But at summer camp, the staff knows the kids are coming daily during set hours, and parents actually pay for that service.
I, too, would love a few kid-free hours, but those are few and far between. Why? Because I know it’s downright rude to send my children to other people’s homes without prior invitation—or a time limit, for that matter.
I want to walk around without a bra as long as possible without worrying about traumatizing anyone other than my own children, who are used to that sight. I want my snacks to last longer than two days without being raided by a horde of kids. I want to work with minimal interruptions (and trust me, I get enough of those from my own little ones).
I just want a little peace and quiet now and then without worrying about Lucas, who I don’t trust in the same way I trust my kids due to his different house rules. But when your kids have friends over, you have to be the supervising adult, which can be exhausting when other parents impose that responsibility on you. After all, turning the kid away can hurt his feelings, and it’s not his fault.
So, fellow parents, please be mindful of your children’s whereabouts this summer. A quick call or text before sending them over can go a long way. If you want them out of the house for a good chunk of the day, there are services for that; it’s called daycare. Which, by the way, is not my home.
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In summary, let’s be considerate of one another and maintain some boundaries this summer.
Keyphrase: My Home Isn’t Your Free Childcare
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