A Candid Warning: Welcoming a Third Child Changes Everything

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Everyone assured me that bringing a third child into our family would be a breeze compared to the leap from zero to one or one to two. “You won’t even notice the difference,” they claimed. Well, it turns out, they were mistaken. Perhaps it’s due to the age gaps, the unique personalities of each child, or maybe our family dynamic just isn’t typical. Whatever the reason, the arrival of our third child turned our world upside down.

Having three kids ushered in a multitude of adjustments, many of which were unexpected:

Dining Out? Forget It.

My partner and I used to pride ourselves on being food enthusiasts. Before the kids, we dined out frequently, and even after our first two, we managed to keep it up. I felt quite accomplished for maintaining that tradition. However, once our third child arrived, managing a meal out felt like an insurmountable task. With more kids than adults, keeping them content through an entire meal without disturbing other diners was overwhelming—definitely not enjoyable, and frankly, terrifying. Now, takeout is our go-to, usually consumed in the car while the kids enjoy their homemade lunches, or better yet, in front of the TV after the little ones are tucked in for the night.

My Coffee Addiction Skyrocketed.

I’ve always enjoyed coffee, treating myself to a mocha on particularly tough days. In the early years of parenting, coffee was a luxury, not a necessity. But with a third baby that had a wildly unpredictable sleep schedule, coffee transformed into a daily ritual—often multiple times a day. My standards dropped; I no longer sought out specialty coffee. Instant coffee at home became my lifeline. I needed that caffeine boost to handle three energetic, demanding (yet undeniably adorable) little ones from dawn till dusk.

Home-Cooked Meals? Not Anymore.

I now manage to whip up a homemade dinner just two or three times a week. Let’s be honest: who has the time or energy for more, even fueled by caffeine? On off days, we rely on leftovers, frozen meals from Costco or Trader Joe’s, and sometimes, in moments of sheer desperation, we throw together a plate of crackers and nitrate-free pepperoni, alongside a pouch of applesauce, and call it a meal.

Screen Time? We’ve Hit the Maximum.

Before our second child, our first had zero screen time. That changed with the arrival of her little sister. But once the third child was born, I found myself seeking distractions for the older kids while I tended to the baby or cleaned up messes. Cooking with three kids at my feet tested my patience repeatedly. We’ve since established a limit of four shows a day, and if someone’s sick? Forget the rules. Twelve hours of TV is fair game.

Germs Are Terrifying Now.

You’d think I’d become accustomed to germs with three kids running around, but no. After surviving a winter full of sickness—two rounds of the flu, pinkeye, ear infections, pneumonia, and even vaginal strep—I’ve become a germaphobe. I’ve invested in countless vitamins and natural remedies, but it never seems enough. At this point, I’m ready to wave the white flag. Let the germs have their way—unless the thought of more illness sends me into panic mode.

Independent Kids? I Let Go of Control.

I’ve also stepped back from micromanaging my kids’ clothing choices. Did you know a three-year-old can dress herself? I certainly didn’t until our third arrived, prompting me to relinquish control over mundane matters. This shift has lightened my emotional load significantly; it’s akin to shedding 20 pounds without any actual effort on my part.

This list barely scratches the surface of the changes we’ve faced since our third child—an adorable, stubborn little gremlin—joined us. Every aspect of our lives has transformed, and we’re still navigating these changes. It’s been a journey filled with unexpected challenges, many of which I wish someone had warned me about.

Yet, for all the chaos, those who insisted that adding a third child was no big deal got one thing right: our lives are richer now. Our hearts overflow with more laughter, joy, and love than we ever imagined. Some days, we even find ourselves contemplating the idea of a fourth child.

Imagine that.

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Summary:

Having a third child is a transformative experience filled with unexpected challenges and changes. From dining out and meal preparation to screen time and managing germs, every aspect of parenting shifts dramatically. However, despite the chaos, the joy and love that a third child brings can outweigh the difficulties, enriching family life in ways that are truly rewarding.

Keyphrase: Welcoming a third child changes everything

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