As bedtime approaches, the struggle begins. With a queen-sized bed and a sidecar twin, my 3-year-old still manages to end up in our bed. After nursing him to sleep, I sneak away to spend some time with my partner. But it’s not long before the little one, whom we’ll call Max, starts stirring. His fretful cries begin, a sound that signals either a return to sleep or a full-blown meltdown. I reach over to comfort him, covering him with a blanket and giving him gentle pats. For a moment, he settles down.
But soon enough, the crying starts again. It’s nearly midnight, and Max needs to sleep; he was up until 9 p.m. as it is. I wait, hoping he’ll drift back off, but the cries only intensify. I stroke his hair, and he slips into a restless sleep filled with kicks and moans. I realize this will be another long night.
It turns out that sleep struggles aren’t just for newborns and infants; toddlers and preschoolers can be just as challenging. At 6 a.m., Max is awake and demanding his morning “mama milk.” Normally, I only nurse him at bedtime, but desperate times call for desperate measures. I pull down my tank top, and he latches on like a hungry little shark. After a few minutes of blissful sleep, he suddenly demands “the other mama milk.” Oh, great.
I roll him over and repeat the process. Then, out of the blue, Max decides he’s fully awake. He sits up and declares, “I awake!” before bounding to the living room. I can only hope he doesn’t create too much chaos while I stumble after him, desperately wishing my partner has started the coffee.
According to Parents, toddlers aged 1 to 2 should sleep for 11 to 14 hours, including two naps. For kids aged 3 to 5, the recommendation is 10 to 13 hours, typically with one nap that often disappears by age 5. However, Max dropped his nap at 2, much to my dismay. Parents suggest establishing routines and schedules, preventing kids from getting out of bed at night, and providing a comforting item to ease nighttime fears.
Over at Make a Mom, parenting expert Lisa Thompson notes that toddlers might wake at night due to a desire for control and autonomy. Factors like a new sibling, starting preschool, dietary changes, or a parent going back to work can contribute to sleep difficulties. Even potty training or too much sleep during the day might be culprits. But none of these apply to Max’s sleeplessness. Thanks for nothing, Lisa.
I’m not the only one facing this challenge. Jessica Collins, a fellow parenting writer, shares that her 3-year-old is also a sleep nightmare. “He’s impossible to put on a schedule,” she says. After battling it out for months, she finally threw in the towel—now her son is a creature of the night, sleeping all day and wanting to party after dark, something I can totally relate to.
As the parenting experts insist, Max should be napping at least once a day. However, we learned the hard way that if he does nap, he won’t go to bed until 1 a.m. Sometimes he dozes off in the car, and we can only cross our fingers that it’s not for too long, or else it messes up everyone’s sleep schedule.
According to Today’s Parent, sleep expert Dr. Amanda Wells reports that about 40% of children will experience sleep problems by age 18. These issues include anything that affects the child or family’s sleep. Sounds about right—at least Max and I are getting our struggles out of the way early.
We encountered similar issues with my 7-year-old, who now sleeps peacefully through the night. Thank goodness for that! I hold onto hope that Max will eventually follow suit, one day—oh, what a glorious day that will be.
For all the parents of terrible sleepers out there, know that you are not alone. We’re in this together.
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Summary
Navigating the sleep struggles of toddlers and preschoolers can be just as challenging as dealing with infants. With sleepless nights, early wake-ups, and constant demands, parents often find themselves in a cycle of fatigue. Expert advice on routines and understanding your child’s need for autonomy can help, but every child is different. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey!
Keyphrase: toddler sleep issues
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