I have ADHD and an anxiety disorder. My therapist says that it’s quite common to experience both simultaneously. While it makes me feel less like a unique individual, it also makes me feel more like a typical oddball. Unfortunately, these conditions often come with a generous serving of social awkwardness. You know the type—the kid who always blurts out answers that are completely off-topic? Yup, that’s me. In grad school, my partner compared me to a quirky character from a book, and while it was meant as a compliment, I still find myself navigating life without picking up on essential social cues. It’s inconvenient, it’s frustrating, and above all, it’s just awkward.
1. I Often Don’t Realize I’m Being Awkward.
In the series Sherlock, Holmes is portrayed as someone who disregards social cues. I sometimes wish I had a friend like Watson to gently nudge me when I’m being odd. There are moments when I’m lost in my own thoughts, completely unaware that someone is attempting to engage me in conversation. I might have what I think is a delightful chat with a new acquaintance, only to discover later that we’ve met before and I’ve repeated myself!
2. Yet, I Constantly Worry About My Awkwardness.
I’ve been embarrassed enough times to know I’m not always in tune with social norms, and the fear of breaking them keeps me on edge. For example, if I see my favorite barista at the mall, I panic: Should I greet her? What’s the appropriate length for a small talk session? Most people navigate these interactions seamlessly. I, on the other hand, might pray for a sudden child-related emergency to avoid the conversation.
3. I’m Not Ignoring You, I Promise.
I have some social habits that can come across as disinterest. I check my phone frequently—thanks to ADHD, it’s like a dopamine hit every time I scroll through updates. Even though I may appear distracted, I assure you I’m still engaged. I might even be looking around for my kids while I’m nodding along, completely oblivious to how my actions are perceived.
4. My Friends Are Often Just As Awkward.
Throughout school and into adulthood, I’ve always gravitated towards the quirky crowd. Whether it was the eccentric kids in my school or the moms who brew their own kombucha and have eclectic hobbies, I find comfort in shared awkwardness. Our homes may be a bit chaotic, but we bond over our unique interests and our tendency to drift off mid-sentence.
5. I Fear My Kids Will Inherit My Awkwardness.
Thankfully, my partner is wonderfully well-adjusted, but I can’t help but worry that my little ones will pick up my quirks. For example, my 7-year-old’s fascination with the Revolutionary War raises concerns about social connections. Will they struggle to relate to their peers? Will their friends accept their unique passions, even if they sing Hamilton in an unusual tone?
6. I Am Forgetful.
When I say I forget things, it’s more serious than misplacing my keys. I might not recall we’ve met before or remember your children’s names. This can lead to panic when I realize I’m fumbling through small talk. I’ll start fiddling with my cuticles or checking my phone again. I won’t even notice how my anxiety might be putting others off.
7. I May Interrupt with Random Thoughts.
My brain doesn’t always follow a straight path, which means I might suddenly bring up something unrelated during conversation. For instance, if we’re discussing parenting techniques, I might blurt out a memory about my husband forgetting trash day. I hope you’ll roll with it and steer us back, but not everyone understands this quirk.
8. I Honestly Mean It as a Compliment.
When I notice something cool about someone, I might blurt it out, like expressing admiration for a stranger’s hairstyle. Immediately after, I worry that I’ve crossed a line or made myself seem overly forward.
9. I Relive Social Interactions.
After talking to someone, I often replay our conversation in my mind, scrutinizing every word I said that may have come off as odd. I fixate on the wrong things, convinced that I’ve turned them off completely.
10. I Can’t Always Discern Your Feelings.
I struggle to read social cues just as much as I create them. There’s someone I know who seems gruff but is actually quite kind. Each interaction leaves me doubting their perception of me, leading to unnecessary self-criticism until I remind myself that it’s just her demeanor.
11. I Don’t Know When to Stop Talking.
I have a tendency to overshare. Casual friends probably don’t need to hear about my breastfeeding journey or my obsession with a certain TV character. In my little bubble, I forget what’s considered too much information.
In summary, being socially awkward can be challenging. Making new friends feels like an uphill battle, and every chance encounter can lead to anxiety. You might find yourself fixated on the wrong social details, all while worrying about how your children are perceived or if your friends are judging you. This experience can be isolating, but remember, you’re not alone in navigating this complex social landscape.
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Keyphrase: Socially awkward experiences
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