Last night, my youngest son and I tackled the challenge of assembling a bathroom cabinet that seemed to come with a million tiny parts. Unlike me, he doesn’t need the instruction manual; he thrives on this chaos. He eagerly unwraps every piece, sorts them meticulously—sorting is essential for him—then dives right in.
“We can do this, Mom,” he assures me, glancing at the pictures, picking out a few pieces from his organized piles, and examining each one closely before starting the assembly. His knuckle-cracking habit has become a regular sound in our house, often interrupting his thought process. At least it’s an improvement from his previous habit of pinching his neck, which left dark bruises. We’ve come a long way, and honestly, I can tolerate the constant cracking.
With his help, I managed to maintain my sanity while assembling this behemoth. I probably shouldn’t be allowed to buy furniture with a “some assembly required” label, but I can’t resist when I spot something adorable online, knowing he’ll join me in the construction process. Together, we’ve successfully built a desk, a dresser, two cabinets, and a chair (with only a smattering of frustration on my part).
This boy amazes me daily with his quick wit and humor. He’s caring and incredibly bright, but oh my goodness, he never stops moving. It can be maddening at times, and I often have to remind myself to keep my frustration in check.
His teachers have been a tremendous support. They were the ones who recognized that he needed movement to learn effectively. They provided him with a big, bouncy ball to sit on during class, and chewing gum is now allowed. They even offer “fidgets,” which are essentially stress balls, so the kids can channel their energy without disrupting the class. This approach has made a significant difference for my son and me. Although he still needs gentle reminders to focus, his impulse control has improved significantly, thanks to the insights from his teachers. I’ve adopted their strategies at home, and it’s been transformative.
Sporting events are a challenge; he dreads sitting still for hours watching his older siblings play. We always leave with a stress ball, gum, and a book in tow. While he still squirms, he manages to cope by chewing gum and squeezing the ball for dear life. Wearing a coat seems to provide him comfort too, and he sometimes insists on wearing his winter coat to bed.
Even during trips to the movies, which he eagerly anticipates, I can see that he requires a fidget in one hand and a snack in the other to stay engaged. I often catch him staring wide-eyed at the screen, squeezing his ball furiously. The times we forget it, I can see how much more difficult it is for him to settle down and enjoy the film.
Long car rides used to be a nightmare until I realized he needs to have some avenue for movement while strapped into his seat. When doing homework, he often has to walk around or swivel on his stool at the kitchen island to complete his assignments. He also enjoys bouncing on large exercise balls.
I’ve come to understand that many kids are fidgety, and just because my son requires different strategies than his older siblings—who can sit still without issue—doesn’t mean he’s a “bad” kid. All children need to move; they crave physical activity, whether it’s rolling down hills, climbing, running, or dancing. My son just needs more movement than most.
If you’re parenting a child who can’t stay still, you probably know how stressful it can be. I sometimes feel guilty when his restlessness tests my patience, knowing he can’t help it. It doesn’t matter how much he’s already played outside; he simply needs an outlet for his energy while he’s awake.
Memory and movement are interconnected. My son learns best through action rather than passive observation, so I must be patient and allow him to discover his own learning style. Plus, the upside is that I’ll always have a little helper for those spontaneous IKEA visits.
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