I embarked on motherhood with the understanding that I would be needed, though I underestimated the extent of that need. It quickly became apparent that nurturing another human being takes a toll on both body and mind. Yet, I went ahead and had another child, and then another, fully aware of the diminishing pockets of free time on the horizon. Such sacrifices are part of the journey we embrace for our kids and families.
Some days, the constant demands don’t faze me. I recognize that the neediness of children is cyclical. They will always seek their parents, despite what others might suggest. However, as they grow and form their own relationships, I know things will shift. Still, on certain days, the weight of their dependence can be overwhelming.
The idea of indulging in a beloved hobby without constant interruptions feels like a distant dream. I often fantasize about sneaking away to lock myself in the car or checking into a nearby hotel just to reconnect with myself. I don’t require a lengthy retreat; a brief check-in with my own self would suffice. After 13 years of motherhood, I’ve learned that carving out time for myself is essential, regardless of how fatigued I feel or how busy my family is.
That’s why, just the other night, while my family was lost in peaceful slumber, I found myself chatting with a friend on Facebook Messenger. The night before, I fought to keep my eyes open while engrossed in an incredible book. Yes, I could have succumbed to sleep, but the serenity of the night wrapped in my down comforter, coupled with glimpses of the moon through my window, felt too good to resist.
I’ve burned the midnight oil sewing quilts, binge-watched HGTV until the early hours, and tackled home projects like painting cabinets when I should have been sleeping—all because it’s easier to focus without distractions. Completing a project in one go is an exhilarating feeling.
Every Saturday and Sunday morning, I face a choice: linger in bed as dawn breaks or quietly slip outside for my daily run. Those moments alone with my thoughts, while the kids catch up on sleep, are invaluable. I relish the freedom to explore at my own pace, pausing to appreciate the sights around me, whether it’s a field of cows or a flock of turkeys. When I step back inside, I return as a refreshed version of myself. I’ve learned that trading sleep for “me time” makes me a better individual and, ultimately, a better mother.
I know my children depend on me, and I cherish that bond. It’s a fundamental part of my role, and I excel at giving them my all. However, there’s another individual who requires my attention: me. I need to reconnect with myself, uninterrupted, to be fully present and nurturing as a mother.
Too often, mothers drift through their days disconnected from their own identities. Before kids, we were someone else, and while motherhood has undoubtedly improved us, it doesn’t mean we should forget our pre-parent selves. That person is still there, and it’s perfectly acceptable for her to make an appearance occasionally.
For me, those moments arise after the kids are tucked in and the house is quiet.
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In summary, while motherhood is a demanding role that often leaves us drained, carving out late-night ‘me time’ is crucial for our well-being. Embracing these moments of solitude allows us to recharge and reconnect with ourselves, ultimately making us better parents.
Keyphrase: Late-night self-care for mothers
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