As I entered the gym locker room with a friend, she remarked, “You look so thin!” This comment tends to arise whenever I’ve been unwell or injured for an extended period. While intended as a compliment, it struck me differently.
My natural body type resembles a slender figure with an average midsection, complemented by a curvier top half. When I engage in regular exercise, my physique develops some muscle definition, but the moment I experience a setback in my routine, any muscle I’ve gained seems to vanish, leaving me perceived as merely “thin.” The societal perception of thinness is often celebrated, but I don’t see it that way.
My motivation for working out isn’t aesthetic. I respect those who do prioritize their appearance, but my focus is on managing my long-term battle with depression. Exercise provides an endorphin release that complements my antidepressant medication, allowing for a more stable mood.
Being labeled as “thin” isn’t inherently a compliment. Although it may be intended as such, it remains a form of scrutiny regarding one’s body image. If we were to flip the script and say, “You look like you’ve gained weight,” or “When will you get back to your pre-baby body?” it would be unacceptable, yet the underlying issue is the same: we are critiquing how others look.
Such comments can reinforce harmful standards that disproportionately affect women, fostering insecurity about our bodies. While we strive to encourage girls to be recognized for their intelligence and creativity rather than their appearance, we often overlook the lingering effects of our upbringing. Many of us grew up with mothers who were obsessed with dieting and body image, and we continue to wrestle with feelings of body inadequacy.
In a society flooded with fitness and diet promotions on social media, some women may find empowerment in these messages. However, many others face health challenges, are single parents, or simply don’t want to be consumed by their physical appearance and its perceived value.
While well-meaning friends might compliment us on looking “thin” after a period of absence, our children are observing these interactions. Recently, I overheard a young girl in my daughter’s art club boasting about her small waist. I couldn’t resist stepping in: I playfully pointed out that the size of our tummies doesn’t define us, but rather their function is what truly matters. This led to light-hearted giggles as the girls imagined the absurdity of digestive mishaps.
Ultimately, there is no “correct” way to have a body. Even well-intentioned remarks about body shape can inadvertently reinforce judgment. So, I kindly request: please don’t refer to me as “thin.” My goal is to be healthy, content, and indifferent to how my body is perceived.
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In summary, while compliments on physical appearance may seem innocuous, they can perpetuate harmful societal standards and affect self-esteem. It’s vital to shift our focus from appearance to overall health and well-being, both for ourselves and for future generations.
Keyphrase: Thinness as a compliment
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