“An elephant for a nickel is a bargain only if you require an elephant and possess the nickel.” My partner often shares this age-old saying with our kids, and it rings true for us. We are financially strained, and despite our best efforts, saving money remains an elusive goal — that so-called emergency fund is just a dream for us.
We recognize that we belong to the working-poor demographic, and we work tirelessly for every penny we have. Yet, some people seem to believe that poverty is synonymous with laziness and poor financial choices, suggesting that all we need to do is “pull ourselves up by our bootstraps” and stash away some cash.
In the iconic novel To Kill a Mockingbird, Atticus Finch famously remarked, “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view […] until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.” So, let’s take a moment to walk in my shoes.
Needs vs. Wants
In our household, we often debate the distinction between needs and wants. What constitutes a need for my family significantly differs from the perspectives of middle-class or affluent families. For instance, internet access may be seen as a necessity by many, yet for us, it’s a luxury. Starbucks, fitness trackers, trendy leggings, and smartphones? Those are all wants, not needs. If it doesn’t contribute to our survival, it’s not a need in our eyes.
My partner and I juggle nearly 100 hours of work each week combined, just to secure a safe, warm home, nutritious food, healthcare, clothing, and transportation. Everything else comes last. Date nights consist of snuggling on the couch after the kids are asleep. Holiday gifts usually mean asking for a few essential items like socks or work pants—wrapped up as gifts to keep up appearances. Birthday celebrations take the form of budget-friendly backyard gatherings, grilling hot dogs instead of extravagant parties. I call my closet a “capsule” wardrobe, reflecting the reality that I can only afford a handful of clothing items.
We genuinely cannot save what we don’t have. At every opportunity, we strive to cut costs. We constantly remind ourselves that we don’t need an elephant; the problem is we also don’t have that nickel.
The Reality of Financial Strain
For years, we have hurried to secure appointments at charity organizations, standing in lines outside buildings to apply for winter fuel assistance. There have been times when our financial situation was so dire that we had to dip into our children’s piggy banks just to buy enough groceries to last until payday, all while teaching them the value of saving. Irony at its finest.
Yes, we feel shame—who wouldn’t? Being poor can feel demoralizing in a society that clings to the myth that hard work guarantees prosperity. As we hustle through three jobs and pare down our expenses to the bone, I find myself questioning the viability of the American Dream. It feels distant and intangible to me.
We are poor; this is our reality. Yet, we are doing better than many families. We have a warm, safe home that feels joyful. While my kids may not experience the luxury of vacations or visits to amusement parks, we creatively repurpose everything that comes into our home—from scrap wood to grocery bags—transforming them into fun art projects. Last year, we crafted a Pinterest-worthy treehouse from salvaged wood found at the local dump, all at no cost.
We are financially challenged but resourceful, finding solutions to nearly every problem, but we still haven’t stumbled upon that elusive money tree. Just like the elephant for a nickel, you need to have the funds before you can save them.
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Summary
This piece sheds light on the struggles of a family living in poverty while confronting the misconceptions surrounding financial challenges. The author shares their experiences, emphasizing the difference between needs and wants and the resourcefulness required to navigate life without savings. It highlights the emotional toll of poverty and challenges the myth of the American Dream, ultimately showcasing resilience amidst financial hardship.
Keyphrase: Stop Judging My Family for Not Saving Money
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