A little over a year ago, I took a moment to glance around my home and realized I had only one photo of myself on display. Just one. It was a black-and-white image from my wedding day, a memory of dancing with my partner 14 years prior. Strangely enough, it didn’t even capture my face; it was merely a shot of my back. Yet, that was the only image I felt worthy enough to hang up for guests to see.
I’ve never been fond of being photographed; unlike my siblings, I don’t consider myself photogenic. As the years passed, I became adept at dodging cameras, crafting excuses to stay out of the frame. I found myself preoccupied with my imperfections—my smile, my hair, my nose, my thighs. The list goes on. I avoided being photographed because I couldn’t bear the thought of seeing myself. If I couldn’t appreciate my image, how could I expect others to? Consequently, there are no cherished memories of me with my children during holidays or special occasions, and I was absent from their first-day-of-school photos. I played the role of the photographer during their first birthdays, leaving my presence out of their baby books entirely.
Occasionally, I received photos from friends and family when my children were born, but they ended up hidden in a drawer. I viewed my kids as my muses, believing I wasn’t worthy of being in the spotlight. However, everything shifted when I stumbled upon a remarkable woman on social media about two years ago. Though I didn’t know her personally, she posted a makeup-free selfie for her 40th birthday, showcasing her long braids and unfiltered insecurities. She expressed her nervousness about sharing the image but did so anyway. I found myself looking at her photo repeatedly, seeing none of the flaws she believed she had.
After nearly 12 years of motherhood, I realized how distorted my self-image had become. It was sad and utterly foolish to hide away from the camera. If I couldn’t love myself wholeheartedly, how could I expect anyone else to? We all have imperfections we wish to change, but true beauty lies in embracing ourselves—flaws and all. Here I am, world! I may not conform to conventional standards of beauty or desirability, but I refuse to care because life is unfolding right now, and I want my children to know I was there for the journey.
We often scrutinize ourselves, wishing for a better body, smoother skin, or shinier hair. Yet, when I look at your photo, I see you as a complete, beautiful individual. You are not defined by your size, your features, or any perceived flaws. You are a unique person with a vibrant soul, and I’m too busy appreciating your essence to focus on any imperfections.
So, go ahead—take that picture. Share a selfie, whether you’re dressed up or just waking up, whether you’re nursing your baby or feeling at your best. Capture moments with your kids, even if you need to enlist a stranger to help. These spontaneous snapshots bring joy, and they remind us that life is best appreciated in the moment, even if it means sporting messy hair and no makeup.
Let’s challenge ourselves not to dwell on our perceived shortcomings. I want to see you as you are, and by allowing others to see your true self, you might inspire another woman to embrace her own beauty.
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In summary, it’s time to stop being our own worst critics. Embrace the beauty of the moment, and let the world see you—imperfections and all.
Keyphrase: Embracing Self-Love in Photography
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