Dear Emily,
As you celebrate your 4th birthday, I want to take a moment to share some thoughts with you. First and foremost, I hope you know how truly wonderful you are. I genuinely mean it.
I realize that I can be quite demanding at times (okay, maybe a lot), but my intentions come from a place of love. I often set the bar high for you, and it’s easy to forget that you are still just a little girl. Nevertheless, you often rise to the occasion and even surpass my expectations. I understand that during your childhood (and likely until you become a parent yourself), you may perceive me as strict. However, I firmly believe that our relationship will grow into one built on trust, respect, and an abundance of love—without any sugary baby talk.
I recognize the special bond you share with your father. You both enjoy activities like building with Legos, playing baseball, and indulging in video games and comic books. At times, I may feel a bit out of the loop, especially when you both start liking bands like Radiohead, but I am not jealous. I see your relationship with him as a crucial foundation that will help you grow into a confident and self-assured woman.
Your determination to engage with adults and join us on our everyday adventures—despite them often lacking the thrill of playgrounds or silly costumes—impresses me. You love to travel by plane or car, and you’re generally quite composed during grocery store trips. I’m amazed at how well you can sit through a lengthy dinner at a restaurant and behave like a little adult. Your appreciation for dry humor is just another reason why I know you are special.
Your passion for clams and your relentless pursuit to get every last morsel out of its shell is commendable. When given a choice, you consistently opt for gourmet cheese and fine salami, showcasing your sophisticated palate.
I admire your courage in social situations. You approach groups of girls with confidence and are never hesitant to ask questions of adults. Your default answer to the unknown is almost always a resounding yes, and I find that delightful.
I cherish the way you refer to your little brother as “Noah” and your sister as “Mila.” Your willingness to share your favorite snack, dried mango, with them is heartwarming. It means a lot that you have never suggested sending them back to where they came from; I know I would have had those thoughts at your age!
Always remember: if you stay true to who you are, you will find that people will truly appreciate you. I hope you never doubt your best qualities or lose sight of the beauty within in favor of superficiality.
Even during those moments when I feel frustrated and raise my voice, please know that it stems from my own challenges, not from a lack of pride in you. It’s possible to feel both angry and proud simultaneously, and I’m still learning how to navigate those feelings.
As you grow, I have no doubt you will become an impressive woman—not just because of your future achievements (which I believe will be numerous), but because of your kind heart.
While I sometimes need to work, it pains me to tell you that. Yet, I hope that whatever path you choose in life brings you joy, just as my work brings me happiness.
I hope you don’t mind that I’ve shared some of your pictures online. I’ve been careful to choose moments that I believe you will appreciate in the future.
I know your birthday isn’t technically for a few days, but I couldn’t wait any longer to express how much you mean to me.
With all my love,
Mom
P.S. I know I sometimes toss out your things without asking, and I appreciate your mature reaction when you say, “Mom, I know you threw it away.” Trust me, I do the same to your dad, and that’s just something you’ll both come to understand.
P.P.S. By the time you read this (if you ever do), you’ll be old enough to know that “stuff” can sometimes be used in a more relaxed context.
In summary, my dear Emily, always embrace your uniqueness and the wonderful qualities that make you who you are. The love between us is steadfast, and I am excited to watch you grow into the remarkable woman you will become.
Keyphrase: Lessons for my daughter on her birthday
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