As the year comes to a close, it’s common to reflect on personal growth and set goals for the year ahead. I typically compile a list of resolutions that range from ambitious to achievable. There’s often a fitness goal that fades by January 4, and a desire to maintain my composure when my children test my patience. I also vow to spend more time with my partner, but that usually gets derailed with the influx of birthday invites and sports schedules.
Recently, I took a moment to ponder how I could enhance my role as a parent, spouse, and individual. Surprisingly, I concluded that I am not the one who needs to reevaluate my behavior. That’s not to imply I’m a perfect mother or an exceptional wife—I’m far from it. I haven’t magically shed all my baby weight, nor do I maintain a calm demeanor at all times. The truth is, I’m not the one who needs to reflect; it’s my family who should be having that conversation.
I’m not the one who can’t locate a laundry basket or thinks a half-cleaned kitchen suffices. I don’t throw tantrums or storm out of rooms. I’m the one managing the fallout from everyone else’s actions.
As mothers, we pour our hearts into everything—packing lunches, preparing breakfasts, and listening to endless stories about superheroes. We buy gifts for kids we don’t know, drive our children around like unpaid chauffeurs, and wipe away tears and messes. We do all of this on minimal sleep, usually with a smile.
So instead of making resolutions for ourselves, let’s focus on what our families could improve. Here’s my list:
- Clean Up After Yourselves. We don’t live in a palace. The laundry hamper is within reach—use it! Those shoes left on the floor are a tripping hazard. If I fall and injure myself, who’s going to pick up after you? You!
- Dispose of Your Trash Properly. Even if a garbage can is nearby, you still hand me your wrappers and scraps. Thanks, but that can is waiting for your trash. Find it!
- Help Out More. Partner, I appreciate you, but if you want to be intimate, a little assistance would go a long way. Helping around the house is a great way to show you care.
- Be Grateful for Dinner. Kids, when I was your age, we didn’t have the luxury of “kid-friendly” meals. If you don’t enjoy dinner, just eat it or learn to cook. I’m your mom, not a chef.
- Take Responsibility for Homework. The tantrums over homework are exhausting. Your main responsibilities are to be kind and succeed in school. So, get it done without the fuss!
- Engage with Your Children Without Expectation. Just because I gave birth doesn’t mean I should bear the brunt of parenting. Both of us are responsible for our kids; so step up and be present.
- Tie Your Own Shoes. Everyone in this house is old enough to handle their own shoelaces. Untied shoes are not an option—you’ll learn that the hard way if you trip over them.
- Reach Out to Your Family. Just because I’m the one who carried the babies doesn’t mean I’m responsible for maintaining all family relationships. If you want to keep in touch, you do it.
- Think Before You Speak. Kids, I love your honesty, but sometimes it’s better to keep certain thoughts to yourself. I get enough criticism throughout the day without your input.
- Let Me Sleep! If you see me with my eyes shut, that’s a clear indication I’m resting. Unless there’s a real emergency, let me sleep. You’ll find I’m much more pleasant after a good night’s rest.
For us mothers, the most important resolution might just be to allow ourselves a break. Parenting is tough, and we’re doing the best we can. Your family would agree, but they’re likely busy cleaning up the mess they’ve made.
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In summary, as we enter the new year, let’s shift the focus from self-improvement to encouraging our families to take responsibility for their actions. A little cooperation goes a long way in making home life smoother.
Keyphrase: Family New Year Resolutions
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