When I refer to a “veil,” it’s because that’s how social media often appears to me. While not entirely deceptive, it feels like there’s a delicate, beautifying filter obscuring our true life experiences.
These days, my mornings typically begin with a groggy sip of coffee around 7 a.m., rousing my three kids from their slumber to remind them it’s a school day. I settle at the kitchen table, open my laptop, and inevitably find myself scrolling through Facebook within minutes.
“What’s on your mind?” the platform prompts me each morning. Well, thanks for asking, Facebook. I often share an uplifting quote from Pinterest, post a family photo from our latest adventure, or express my excitement about the upcoming arrival of baby Thompson. And, of course, there’s the obligatory selfie — which I reserve for about once a week, just to ensure my friends and family remember what I look like.
The “memories” feature is usually delightful, and I often share a throwback photo of my kids, reminiscing about how adorable they were and wishing time would slow down. I might post something like, “They are so perfect!” accompanied by my favorite hashtag, #blessed.
A few days ago, I had a thought and logged out of my Facebook account to view it as an outsider. Wow! What a picture-perfect family, I mused. We look so radiant and overwhelmingly joyful in every snapshot.
I don’t intentionally aim to mislead anyone by sharing these moments. In fact, I avoid negativity on social media and strive to keep my posts positive. However, it’s essential to recognize that there’s much more beneath the surface than what we all see while scrolling through our feeds over morning coffee, often subconsciously comparing ourselves to other seemingly flawless families.
I can’t shake off how my Facebook account appeared from an external perspective, prompting me to be candid about some realities.
For instance, that selfie I posted was taken three weeks ago on a day when I actually got a decent night’s sleep — a rarity lately as I approach my third trimester. Now, I’m lucky to get more than two hours of uninterrupted rest, thanks to kicks to the bladder, racing thoughts about childbirth, and the occasional hunger pang at 4 a.m.
Currently, I’m still in the pajamas I’ve worn for three nights, my hair a greasy mess due to the resurgence of morning sickness. I just snapped at my kids for opening yet another box of cereal, despite having three already lying around. One of my browser tabs is a Google search asking “what is normal vaginal discharge in pregnancy?” — a thought I almost mistakenly typed into my Facebook status instead. Next to that is my checking account page, which prompts a resigned sigh as I realize there are groceries to buy, school pictures to pay for, and sports sign-ups looming. Not to mention, we’d love to plan a “babymoon” before the baby arrives, but the budget just doesn’t stretch that far.
You wouldn’t see any of this on my social media, as it would reveal the truth that I’m not always the upbeat, health-conscious, yoga-practicing, makeup-wearing mom I portray.
I’m fairly certain the milk I added to my coffee this morning was past its expiration date. And that picture of our happy family at the beach last week? It was a miracle we got that one shot amidst my daughter elbowing my son, him rolling his eyes because he’s decided he’s too cool for family photos, and my spouse and I bickering about our pizza expense from the night before. But, hey, let’s all smile for the camera!
As I mentioned, it’s not entirely fabricated. I genuinely love my family and think we’re pretty incredible. I appreciate social media as a way to share moments with relatives who live far away or whom I don’t see often. I enjoy posting inspirational quotes to brighten someone’s day amid the often overwhelming barrage of political content and distressing news we face daily.
It’s crucial for us to remember that Facebook, like all social media, presents real life through a veil. The unflattering and challenging moments are filtered out, leaving only the best snapshots of everyone’s lives. So, while you scroll through your feed, don’t fall into the trap of comparison. We’re all dealing with our own challenges. We all have puffy eyes right now. We all have peculiar Google searches in our browser history (don’t deny it!). We may not all sigh at our checking account balance, but we all have our “stuff.”
This article was originally published on Sep. 27, 2016.
In summary, while social media can paint a rosy picture of family life, it’s essential to recognize the realities that often lie behind the curated snapshots. The struggles, the messy moments, and the imperfect days are all part of the journey. This enlightening perspective reminds us that we are not alone in our experiences. For more insight into pregnancy and home insemination, check out Healthline’s excellent resource and consider visiting Make a Mom for an informative look at home insemination options. For a comprehensive kit, see Make a Mom’s at-home insemination kit.
Keyphrase: Facebook lives reality
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