In the realm of motherhood, I have embraced the label of a strict parent, and I take pride in it. My journey through parenting has been filled with introspection, challenges, and growth. When I embarked on this adventure, my knowledge was limited, yet I held steadfast to a few core principles: establish rules, encourage independence, and ensure that our household maintained a balance of rest. Sleep, after all, is non-negotiable—especially for a parent who values their evenings as much as their sanity.
From the outset, I quickly learned that children do not naturally possess an understanding of duty or the importance of maintaining order. Early on, I set simple expectations for my youngest son, such as tidying up his toys. Initially, he struggled to put even a single toy away, but through consistent effort and guidance, he gradually mastered the art of cleaning up after his playtime escapades. This approach extended to my daughter after she joined our family. By leading by example and involving them in our end-of-day routines, they learned the household’s expectations over time.
Teaching my children about responsibility extended beyond managing toys. Our home operates under a strict sleep regimen—naps and bedtimes are firmly established. As any parent of a toddler knows, explaining the necessity of sleep for my own relaxation is often met with resistance. However, instilling the importance of good sleep habits early on has proven beneficial in helping my children develop independence. They learned that I wouldn’t always be there to shield them from their fears, and that knowledge empowered them.
As my children transition into their teenage years, they are now ready to take on more responsibilities. This period presents an ideal opportunity to impart essential life skills that will serve them well in college and beyond. Just as I guided them in organizing their play areas, I now focus on teaching them how to navigate adult tasks, ensuring they won’t be blindsided when they enter their dorm rooms. I have increasingly stepped back, allowing them to take charge of their own responsibilities.
For instance, when my son expressed a desire for more control over his lunch choices, I seized this teachable moment. I stocked our fridge with healthy options and provided guidelines for what he should include, while I enjoyed my coffee nearby. Within weeks, he took the initiative to make lunches for his sister as well, demonstrating newfound independence that contributes to smoother mornings.
It may surprise some to learn that I do not monitor my children’s homework or school project deadlines. While I assist them with challenging assignments and ensure they have necessary materials, the responsibility for due dates rests with them. Helicopter parenting can hinder the development of essential time management skills and accountability. Recently, my son submitted an assignment late, which impacted his grade and his eligibility for the honor society. Although it was a difficult lesson, I refrained from intervening, allowing him to face the consequences and learn the importance of managing his time effectively.
In summary, I maintain high expectations for my children, encouraging them to actively participate in our household while equipping them with the tools to succeed. With only a few years left before they embark on their own journeys, I find satisfaction in witnessing their growth and initiative. I trust their acquired skills—like cleaning the bathroom—will serve them well with future roommates during their college years.
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