A Letter to the Mother of a Child with Special Needs

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Dear Mom of a Child with Unique Needs,

I want to share something personal: I struggle with depression and anxiety. I prefer to be referred to as “a person with depression” rather than a “depressed person” or “depressive.” This belief in person-first language extends to how I view your child with special needs. However, I often find myself uncertain about the appropriate terms to use. Should I say “disability” or “condition”? What about “sick”? My intention is to be respectful and considerate, as I genuinely care.

It’s not necessary for me to label your child, but I truly want our children to connect. It’s essential for my kids to learn about diversity and appreciate that individuals with differences are just as valuable as anyone else. Most importantly, I desire authentic friendships between our children, free from any sense of tokenism.

When it comes to describing your child to my own, I could really use your guidance. I want to ensure I use language that respects your child’s privacy and dignity. For example, I wouldn’t want to disclose personal details about your child that might not be appropriate. When my son notices visible differences, he may have questions, and I want to handle those inquiries with care.

I genuinely hope we can form a bond. I can only imagine the challenges you face as a mom to a child with special needs. The feeling of isolation must weigh heavily on both you and your child. With so many medical appointments and therapies, arranging playdates can be difficult, and it must feel lonely at times. How can my child and I support you? I’m open to listening, or if you prefer a break from medical discussions, I can respect that too. Let’s connect.

If we encounter each other in public, rest assured that I will treat your child with the same respect I would anyone else. When my kids have questions, I’ll do my best to answer them, and I encourage them to approach you directly for clarity. Please feel free to introduce your child to mine when they approach. I believe it could lead to a wonderful new friendship, as my kids enjoy meeting new people.

Before I wrap up, I have one question: Can your child fit at our Lego table? If not, no worries—we’ll find another way to engage.

Thank you for your time, which I know is limited.

Warm regards,
A Fellow Mama

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In summary, I want to foster a supportive connection between our families. I strive to approach your child with understanding and respect while encouraging my kids to embrace diversity. By working together, we can create a nurturing environment for our children.

Keyphrase: Letter to Mother of a Child with Special Needs

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