Updated: January 15, 2021
Originally Published: June 3, 2016
When you discover you’re pregnant, it’s an exhilarating yet nerve-wracking experience. Brace yourself, as this newfound status opens the floodgates for unsolicited advice and probing questions from strangers. Suddenly, those who wouldn’t have glanced your way in the produce aisle feel entitled to offer parenting tips and opinions. If you’re particularly unlucky, you might even find someone reaching out to touch your belly without permission.
It’s baffling how societal norms shift during pregnancy. Imagine being at a deli and turning to someone who is not pregnant, complimenting her outfit, and then proceeding to touch her stomach. The reactions could range from shock to outright hostility. Yet, when you’re pregnant, such boundaries seem to vanish.
Fortunately, I tend to radiate a “don’t talk to me” vibe, especially during my second pregnancy. I distinctly remember sporting a frown while trying to enjoy a day out at the library with my son, only to be approached by well-meaning but overly familiar strangers, including some surprisingly bold older women who felt the need to rub my belly while I was distracted by turtles.
The inquiries are relentless. While pregnant, you spend the majority of your time fielding questions, leaving little room for relaxation, which often looks like binge-watching Netflix with a mountain of pillows. Once the baby arrives, you might assume the questions would subside, but they merely evolve into new forms of awkwardness.
My postpartum body feels alien to me. I can relate to Santa Claus; while my arms and legs quickly regained their tone, my midsection remains stubbornly round. It’s a strange phase, where I find myself looking somewhat pregnant again—not exactly a body type celebrated in fashion magazines. After taking a “What is your body type?” quiz, I concluded my ideal wardrobe consists of either a poncho or a ghost costume.
Navigating postpartum life is a challenge, whether we admit it or not. One particularly embarrassing incident occurred at work in the health care center. A nurse, known for her dry humor, loudly asked if I was expecting my third child. My face turned crimson as I stammered, “Not pregnant. Just gained some weight.” She didn’t catch my comment and kept speculating about my supposed due date, leaving me flustered and searching for an escape.
Throughout the year following my second child’s arrival, I was congratulated on my “pregnancy” at least thirty times. I suppose I’ve become a bit of a professional in handling these situations. So, should you find yourself in a similar predicament, here are some responses to deflect unwanted inquiries about your body:
- Them: When are you due?
You: I’m due to take a break at 9 a.m. - Them: How many months along are you?
You: I’m 360 months old, thank you very much. - Them: Congratulations!
You: Thanks! I didn’t think I’d finish that burrito, but I did! - Them: Is it a boy or a girl?
You: It’s a gluten intolerance I developed after two years of pregnancy. So, eat that!
Ultimately, it doesn’t really matter. The joy these little ones bring outweighs any physical or emotional scars from childbirth. I’ve learned to embrace the humor in these interactions, reminding myself that my journey is unique and worthy of celebration.
For those interested in exploring more about pregnancy and home insemination, I recommend checking out resources like In Vitro Fertilization on Wikipedia or our guide on the Impregnator at Home Insemination Kit. If you’re looking for further insight, the Babymaker At Home Insemination Kit is an excellent authority on the subject.
Summary:
Handling the unsolicited comments and questions about your body during and after pregnancy can be awkward and uncomfortable. From strangers touching your belly to misinterpreting your postpartum shape, navigating these interactions requires humor and patience. Embracing the journey and finding joy in these moments is essential, as is understanding that your body tells the story of your unique experiences.
Keyphrase: postpartum body struggles
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