In our household, we affectionately refer to my son as an “orangehead.” His hair, a stunning mix of sun-kissed sand and rich copper, captivates me every time I run my fingers through it—much like gazing into a tiger’s eye.
When he was born, a college friend, who sported a similar shade, looked at him with sympathy and uttered, “He’s got the curse.” My husband and I were taken aback; we had envisioned a future filled with children adorned in beautiful russet curls. Our friend’s warning about the hardships faced by redheads seemed unfounded, but now, I understand.
Every outing is accompanied by comments from strangers, often multiple remarks from well-meaning adults. The statements range from playful to perplexing, including:
- “Look at that hair!”
- “You’re gonna be trouble!”
- “Hey there, Red!”
- “You’re a fiery little guy, aren’t you?”
- “A ginger!”
- “That hair is just too much!”
- “What’d you do, eat a whole bag of carrots?”
- “Redheads dance with the devil.”
While these comments stem from admiration, my son doesn’t always perceive them positively. Adults might find his hair enchanting, but he often interprets their words as judgments, leading him to feel that his hair is strange or excessive. A simple observation like “Your hair is so red” can feel less like praise and more like a burden when repeated frequently.
Being aware of the potential emotional impact, I took a proactive approach. After he turned two, I began to intervene. When someone exclaimed, “A ginger!” I would chime in, “Yes, isn’t his hair just beautiful?” If they joked about him being trouble, I would clarify, “Oh no, he’s actually a kind and helpful boy.” Most people quickly adjusted their responses, acknowledging his lovely hair, but it still didn’t seem sufficient.
Unfortunately, positive representations of red-haired boys in popular culture are scarce. While redheaded girls face their share of stereotypes, there are also many positive depictions that offer some consolation. Boys, however, often see negative portrayals. The villainous characters in children’s literature frequently have fiery locks, and even the feminist character Violet the Pilot falls into this pattern.
In a fortunate twist, ESPN delivered a refreshing change. The magazine recently featured Andy Dalton on its cover, showcasing him with his striking red hair, and presenting him as a strong yet approachable figure. I recognized an opportunity for a subtle yet impactful lesson.
As soon as the magazine arrived, I placed it on the kitchen counter near a friend who was visiting. I pointed out to her, “Look at this guy! Many people think he’s quite cool and handsome.” My son’s interest piqued, and I left the magazine around the house for him to discover.
A week later, he approached me with the magazine in hand, asking, “Mommy, do you think this man’s hair is handsome?” I replied, “Absolutely, I do!” In that moment, I noticed a smile spread across his face—a mix of relief, self-assurance, and joy that warmed my heart.
Thank you, ESPN, for contributing to my son’s growing pride in his hair.
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Summary:
In this article, I share my journey of helping my son embrace and take pride in his red hair amidst societal stereotypes. By proactively addressing comments from strangers and showcasing positive representations, I aimed to foster his self-esteem and confidence.
Keyphrase: red hair pride in children
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