The journey of parenthood can be endlessly rewarding yet profoundly exhausting, especially during those sleepless nights. When my first child, Oliver, was born, he would only find solace in my arms, cradled like a football. My partner, Lisa, and I divided our nighttime duties: she typically took the first half of the night until around 3 a.m., while I took over from there. Our evenings blurred into long stretches of half-awake TV watching, yearning for a miracle solution to coax him into sleep. Like many new parents, we sought out every possible trick.
Initially, we experimented with the widely recommended “cry it out” method. It’s known for being effective, but I found it to be one of the most difficult parenting choices I ever faced. Lisa and I clashed over this approach for weeks; she believed it was cruel, while I, with bloodshot eyes, felt desperate for rest. As a full-time student and employee, I often found myself dozing off on public transport, waking up in peculiar places.
Finally, we decided to give it a try. We placed Oliver in his crib and allowed him to cry. I offered sporadic comfort without picking him up. It felt like an eternity, and the emotional toll was heavy. After a few nights, he did begin to sleep well for about a week—until he caught norovirus, which threw us back into chaos.
Once he recovered, he was back in my arms at night. Surprisingly, I found this arrangement less taxing than letting him cry, and I abandoned the idea of the “cry it out” method altogether.
Fast forward nine years: we now have three children—two daughters and a son. Throughout their early years, we’ve attempted a myriad of sleep techniques. Despite our best efforts to establish a consistent schedule, work and school commitments often derailed those plans.
We experimented with various essential oils, but they proved to be as effective as snake oil. In our attempts to avoid daytime naps, we found ourselves in a relentless struggle, trying to manage a cranky toddler while also battling our own fatigue. We’d wait for the signs of sleepiness, often leading to disrupted dinners or unfinished tasks, all in hopes of getting one of our children to finally sleep.
We massaged our kids with different soothing lotions infused with lavender, chamomile, and ylang-ylang (still not sure what that last one is). Unfortunately, these lotions either stimulated giggles or had no effect at all, leaving me more exhausted than before. It was frustrating to hear parents rave about these remedies, only to find no success with my own kids—leading me to wonder if something was wrong with them.
Our middle child, Mia, preferred sleeping in her high chair with soft music and no one around. This was a relief for us, although Lisa worried about her never transitioning to her bed. I reassured her, saying, “It’s not like she’ll be in college sleeping in a high chair.” And, of course, I was right—my two oldest, now 9 and 6, go to bed at a reasonable hour, despite the usual bedtime squabbles.
Our youngest, Rosie, who is nearly 2, has her own unique sleep routine. To get her to drift off, I play “Baby Einstein: Lullaby Time” on repeat, clear out the room, and hold her on the couch for a spell. Sometimes it’s a lengthy process. The repetitive visuals and soothing tunes can feel surreal, almost like an acid trip, as I find myself thinking, “The train moves in a circle. I get it now.”
Amid the long nights spent with Rosie, I reflect on how both of my older kids eventually learned to sleep through the night. It took longer than I had hoped, and Lisa and I have exchanged exasperated words that only sleep-deprived parents can understand. I remember reassuring her that our daughter would not be sleeping in her high chair forever.
As much as I wish for a quick solution for my little one, I’ve come to accept that it may take some time. However, the truth is, all children eventually learn to sleep. There is indeed a light at the end of this tunnel. While all the suggested methods may not work for everyone, the fundamental elements of unconditional love and patience are what truly matter. And I’m certain you possess those qualities in abundance.
For those navigating the challenging waters of sleepless nights, remember: it will get better. Your children will learn to sleep. For additional insights on family planning and support, consider checking out other resources like this Cryobaby Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit or learn more about fertility options from Make A Mom. For a deeper understanding of pregnancy and home insemination, you can visit Wikipedia’s page on In Vitro Fertilisation.
Summary
Parenting can be a challenging journey, especially when it comes to getting children to sleep. Every child is different, and while numerous sleep methods exist, the most effective tools are often love and patience. In time, children do learn to sleep, providing hope for weary parents.
Keyphrase: Sleep-deprived caregivers
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