At the age of 15, I experienced my first panic attack while walking home with a friend. Without warning, I collapsed on the ground, rendered unable to speak, walk, or breathe properly. My vision became blurry and my hands trembled; I genuinely believed I was on the brink of death. My friend rushed to get my parents, who quickly arrived to find me curled against a tree, engulfed in distress. That night was a blur of tears, vomiting, and hyperventilation, marking one of the most challenging experiences of my life.
In the following months, I found myself in similar situations, often needing to be taken to the hospital by neighbors. Each time, doctors assured me I was fine, but I knew something was amiss. It turned out I was grappling with an anxiety disorder, which has since been a constant presence in my life.
I’ve sought therapy and tried various mood-stabilizing medications. While some strategies have helped prevent attacks, nothing has provided relief during those intense episodes quite like marijuana. I utilize marijuana as a coping mechanism, particularly when stressors in my life become overwhelming. There are months when I may need it daily, while other times I can go half a year without feeling the need to smoke. However, as I mature and experience worsening side effects from pharmaceuticals, my reliance on marijuana has increased.
Narcotic painkillers heighten my anxiety, which makes marijuana my go-to option for managing pain from back and shoulder injuries. Sleep aids leave me groggy and plagued by nightmares, but marijuana allows for restful nights without those adverse effects. This plant has become a miracle solution for my ailments, helping me navigate life as a parent, spouse, and professional.
I use a device known as a “one hitter,” which delivers about two puffs of smoke—just enough to alleviate my anxiety, pain, or insomnia. On particularly tough days, I might use it up to three times if I’m contending with anxiety and pain simultaneously.
Acquiring my marijuana is done with care, as medical marijuana was only recently legalized in my state and is still inaccessible to many, including myself. I rely on friends to help me obtain it from states where it’s legally available, as I don’t have connections with drug dealers. As a work-from-home mom with three children under seven, that lifestyle simply doesn’t fit my reality.
When I disclose my medicinal marijuana use to others, most respond with understanding. I explain, “I have a panic disorder, and marijuana helps with my anxiety attacks.” My loved ones care about my well-being, and they recognize that I am taking steps to maintain my health and emotional equilibrium. Although some express concern about potential legal issues, they ultimately support my choices.
I intend to secure a medical marijuana license as soon as it’s possible in my state. Both my doctor and I agree on its effectiveness for my condition, and we are now waiting for legislative changes to expand the list of eligible diagnoses for marijuana treatment. Ironically, if I were a combat veteran, my anxiety disorder would already be recognized under current laws.
I am fortunate to reside in an area where I can utilize marijuana without fearing for my safety or career. While it’s not completely legal, the ambiguity of the laws allows me to use it with relative peace of mind. Each time I feel that familiar anxiety creeping in, I remember that first panic attack—the fear and helplessness—and I reach for my one hitter. With just two puffs, the panic subsides.
The existence of something that can alleviate my panic attacks is a source of great comfort. I no longer have to dread sleepless nights characterized by distress and overwhelming anxiety. My life is better, safer, and more manageable, all thanks to marijuana.
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In summary, marijuana has significantly enhanced my quality of life by providing relief from panic attacks and other stress-related symptoms. Its role in my health journey has been transformative, allowing me to navigate the challenges of adulthood and parenthood with greater ease.
Keyphrase: Marijuana and Anxiety Relief
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